My Love, my Darling || Voltiaere [BL] - Discontinued

Chapter 11

Y/n's pov.:

Your eyes open as you slowly recognise your shared room. You attempt to get up which was a big mistake. Your stomach churns and you quickly run as you just catch the toilet bowl. A headache builds as you throw up what little food you had in you. You instantly recognise the cold hand that landed on your back, but this time you don't mind it on your burning hot skin. ,,Why are you here?,, you ask in the short moment you weren't dry heaving.

,,Collect yourself first and then I'll explain,, he says while rubbing your back. After what felt like forever the need to throw up died down. You look up from the toilet bowl and wince at the harsh light. He must have gotten the hint, because the next thing you know the only light on was the dim one on your desk. ,,You usually have migraines?,, he asked getting up.

You slowly nod so it doesn't hurt too much. He comes back with a glass of water and a pill. You recognise it as the headache stuff he gave you a week ago ,,Thank you,,.

You take the medication, but instantly feel nauseous again when you drink the water. ,,Don't throw up. It takes about 30 minutes to an hour for it to take effect,, he reminded you.

,,Dear god what have I ever done to you to deserve this life,, you whine curling up on the bathroom floor.

,,Some people believe that our souls choose their life. Like in a pre-show. They know exactly what's ahead of them. They decide if they are strong enough to live out the life or not,, you groan.

,,If that is so, then why does suicide exist?,, you blurt out.

,,How long have you had them?,, he asked you, but you looked at him confused. ,,The migraines,, he clarified.

,,What is it to you?,, that came out maybe harsher than it should have.

,,Just answer the question,, you decide to be stubborn and keep your mouth shut. ,,Listen, I could be doing way better things at four in the morning on a Saturday, but I am stuck here with you just as much as you are stuck with me. Now we can either make conversation and make time go faster or you can suffer alone,, he raised one brow waiting for your answer. ,,Alright then,, he got up from the floor.

,,No! Wait! Please don't leave!,, you say gripping his trousers. He looked down at where you were gripping *Well done you tw*t! Way to show him how pathetic you are*. You let go and curl back up ,,Just go. Sorry for wasting your time.,,.

You hear him sigh ,,At least go back to bed. The bathroom is dreadfully uncomfortable,,.

,,You'd be surprised,, you slowly get up and walk over to your bed. You stop for a second ,,I think I'm going to be sick again,, you whine.

He guides you to your bed and tucks you in. ,,Keep yourself straight,, you look at him with an unamused look. ,,I meant don't curl up into a ball,,.

You listen to him and try to lay on your stomach, but he pushes you on your side. He takes your arm and rubs his thumb over it applying pressure here and there ,,What are you doing?,,.

,,One of the many methods against nausea is acupuncture. Since I only know the theory of it and don't have any acupuncture needles, I am applying pressure to the necessary spot,, he said.

,,How do know this? You want to be a doctor or something?,, you ask.

,,Something like that. You?,, you thought about it, but couldn't think of anything.

,,I.....don't know. Guess I....never thought about it,, you're a bit sad at the fact that you don't know what you want to do with your life.

You look over towards your dorm mate who is somehow still asleep. What surprised you was that William was also on the other edge of the bed asleep as well.

,,They both sleep like rocks. The entire school knows whenever we have fire alarms at night that whoever is closes has to wake them up,, you weirdly giggle at the thought of them sleeping through danger.

,,Must be nice. To be able to sleep that good,, you think out loud.

,,You don't sleep very well, do you?,, he asked in the most soothing voice you've ever heard.

,,Sadly no. I don't know why, my brain can't just stop working,, he just hums and continues. ,,Six yea-.....Seven years,, now he looks at you confused. ,, You asked me earlier how long I've had migraines. Seven almost eight years. I got them just before I turned twelve,, you explain.

,,Do you....Would you care to explain why?,, he asked in the same relaxing tone as before.

You sigh closing your eyes ,,My mum and dad think it stems from brain damage. Among other things,,. He doesn't say anything. You take your arm from his hold and turn to the other side ,,Thank you and again, sorry for the bother,,. You close your eyes and hope that he leaves which he eventually does. It wasn't till you sniffled that you realised you were crying *Mumbling idiot*.

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Voltiaere's pov.:

You walk back to your dorm. You sigh as you look at the quiet room *Just as before*. You normally share your dorm with William, but with him falling asleep at theirs, it was once again lonesome. You sit on your desk and get your notebook out. Opening a new page, you write everything down you need and come up with one conclusion.

*Stop wasting your time by thinking about it* laying in your bed you close your eyes hoping to get some sleep before the early morning.

Name: Y/n Blue

File: Glanced over

Issues/Problems: Migraines; Inner homophobia; Self-hatred; Self-isolation; Self-harm (unconfirmed); Depressive tendencies

- more to be written down

You sigh tossing and turning finding trouble sleeping *You won't be able to help him. He's nothing like Arny*. Looking at your clock you see that your alarm is about to go off *He might hate you if he figures it out, but maybe not himself*. Your alarm goes off and you instantly turn it off ,,F**k,,.

Conclusion: Trauma