Saving Grace

Free to Be You and Me -- Holy Oil

~*****~

The hairs on my neck stood straight up while we sat at the safe house, going over the minimal lore we had on Archangels. I let my gaze slide up and I snorted irritably. "Where've you been?" I ask irritably.

"Jerusalem." Castiel answers simply.

Dean scoffs. "Oh. How was it?"

Castiel approaches us and places a dusty old jug onto the table. "Arid." He sighs.

"What is that?" Dean asks.

"It's oil. It's very special and very rare." Castiel explains.

"Okay, are we gonna... trap Raphael with a nice vinaigrette?" Dean teases as I peer into the jug, my fingers slipping against the rim. A wave of familiarity washes over me.

"No," I chuckle. "That'd be funny, though. No, holy oil can protect someone from angels-- hiding them in plain sight."

"That's... an odd way to use it, but yes. That's correct." Castiel said lightly.

"So, this ritual of yours, when's it got to go down?" Dean asks.

"Sunrise."

"Tell me something-- you keep saying we're gonna trap this guy, but isn't that kind of like trapping a hurricane with a butterfly net?" Dean continues.

"No, it's harder." Castiel responds with a sigh.

"Do we have any chance of surviving this?" I ask.

"You two do." Castiel says softly.

Dean glances at me worriedly. "So, odds are, you're a dead man tomorrow?" Dean presses.

"Yes." Castiel nods.

Dean glances at me again and sighs. "Well, last night on Earth." Dean mentions. "What, uh... what are your plans?"

Castiel glances up at him. "I just thought I'd sit here quietly." Castiel states.

Dean glances around for a moment. "Dude, come on. Anything?" Dean hums. "Booze, women?" Castiel nervously glances at him, then to me, then down at his hands. "You have been with a woman before, right? Or an angel, at least?"

Castiel rubs at the back of his neck in embarrassment. "That's... That's kinda hot." I mention, my eyes trained on him.

"Hey, hey--" Dean admonishes me. "We can do the virgin play in the bedroom," Dean comments before leaning over to Castiel. "You mean to tell me you've never been up there doing a little cloud-seeding?"

"Look, I've never had occasion, okay?" Castiel responds almost painfully.

"Dude," Dean and I say to each other at the same time.

"Let me tell you something, there are two things that I know for certain." Dean comments as he grabs his jacket and tosses mine to me. "One, Bert and Ernie are gay. Two, you are not gonna die a virgin. Not on our watch."

"Let's go~" I chirp to Castiel and follow after Dean eagerly.

~*****~

I'd never thought I'd see anything cuter than Dean laying in bed in his post orgasm bliss. Castiel looked like he was going to vomit with how nervous he was, with all the sexy women strutting around us. I sat perched on Dean's lap, my jacket discarded, breasts practically pushed into Dean's face as we stared at Castiel.

"Hey," Dean called to Castiel as he gazed around. "Relax."

"This is a den of Iniquity." Castiel comments lowly. "I should not be here. Neither should you."