Coworkers to Cock-blowers: Chapter 1

Tenderness of a Teacher

SpongeBob wakes up, bandages over his eyes and a searing hot pain in his skull. He tries to sit up, but finds he is paralysed. His head rushes as he considers all of his possibilities. Is he quadriplegic? Is he just sore from the fight? Could the Sharingan transplant be to blame?

He tries to speak, but his throat is dry, and he rasps for a nurse or a doctor.

"Mr. SquarePants!" You're in no position to be awake!" A nurse instructs, inserting an IV drip into his arm to sedate him. The sponge re-enters his deep sleep, dreaming a dream of power and victory.

SIX MONTHS LATER

"Controlling the Sharingan is important. Especially considering that you have the Mangekyou Sharingan, the most dangerous kind to wield. The Sharingan has been exclusive to the Krabs clan for centuries, and you are the first outsider to wield it. This could kill you or benefit you. If you don't train adequately, it will be the former."

SpongeBob stopped listening to his instructor, Tojirama Krabs. Despite experiencing the opportunity to train with a master of the Sharingan, he had lost his will to become the strongest man in the ocean. It didn't matter how strong he was if Eugene wasn't at his side.

SpongeBob zones out and recalls a memory from his time fighting in the fourth great crustacean war with Eugene. It was about three years before they defeated ten thousand men together, and five years before the war ended. SpongeBob was still reliant on Ninjutsu, and Mr Krabs' transformation Jutsu was still a work in progress, meaning that he could only muster a few spikes and a drill on his right arm. Both were strong, formidable men at that time, about 23 and 24 years old respectively. Although they were far from being the strongest men in Bikini Bottom, both were Chunin level shinobi, and performed at an impressive standard.

The two of them were drafted into the same battalion to take down New Kelp City's army. Eugene Krabs had fought with an officer from New Kelp City's army and lost. SpongeBob helped cover for Eugene when the officer came to strike the crustacean with the finishing blow. He killed the officer to save his comrade. What came from that was the beginning of a ten-year friendship between two men that would eventually become some of the strongest shinobi Bikini Bottom would ever raise.

What followed was years of training that would elicit a fighting spirit in the pair, and a sense of unwavering resolve that would stick with them even until the final moments of their friendship. SpongeBob had mastered Ninjutsu, being a natural born genius at the craft, and was inspired to learn Taijutsu from encountering an opponent that was impervious to Ninjutsu. After three years, at the age of 29, he was a certified Taijutsu master, and still had four years before the most important fight of his life.

Eugene Krabs took a darker path to seeking power. At age 30, he had surpassed SpongeBob by murdering Pearl Otsuka in her sleep. She was the most proficient user of whale style Jutsu, exclusive to her clan, and Eugene Krabs absorbed her power through a chakra transferral Jutsu. This Jutsu is forbidden and murdering a member of the Otsuka clan is regarded far and wide as punishable by death.

Eugene, by sheer luck, had managed to unlock his Sharingan and fought off the entire Otsuka clan. Of course, this added to his notions of power and superiority, and one could argue that nothing in Bikini Bottom would ever be the same from the day onward.

Upon seeing SpongeBob surpass him after the war, Eugene fell into a great depression, only curable through re-surpassing SpongeBob. Was this an impossible task? Eugene was fuelled by anger and jealousy and knew that his new reason for living was to surpass SpongeBob, and maybe even his father, the strongest man in Bikini Bottom.

He trained day in and day out, and after gaining his newfound strength, he immediately challenged his dear friend SpongeBob to a friendly spar and won. He had defeated the second strongest man in Bikini Bottom, leaving only his father: Yusuke Krabs.

He had a glimmer of hope now that he was the second strongest man in Bikini Bottom, even though he didn't have Susanoo, Amaterasu, or Tsukuyomi.

"SpongeBob? Are you listening?" Tojirama inquires, receiving SpongeBob's cold glare as a response. "Well, I understand why you don't want to master the Sharingan. For starters, it doesn't come naturally to you, being from the SquarePants clan. Additionally, they remind you of my nephew Eugene. I miss him too. Knowing that he did such a thing has caused the Krabs clan great shame and unease." He adds, still negotiating with SpongeBob's emotions.

"I... still want to learn, Tojirama sensei. I've just lost motivation... my eyes are stuck as the Sharingan no matter how much I try to hide them... I don't look into the mirror and see myself anymore... I just see Eugene." SpongeBob says, his eyes shrink-wrapped with tears.

"I understand how you feel, SpongeBob-boy. But some people only learn through pain."

As SpongeBob takes his head out of his hands and wipes the tears from his eyes, Tojirama appears behind him, a kunai to SpongeBob's throat. "Must I spar with you to teach you a lesson? Or shall I kill you, as punishment for failing to master the Sharingan? You are weak. You will never grow until you understand that." SpongeBob has stopped crying.

"I am the strongest man in the village, old man. I possess Taijutsu skills beyond your comprehension. If we were to fight, I'd win. I shall smite you if you misspeak again." SpongeBob weaves the Jutsu sign for Chidori, and watches as a small blue dot the size of a pinhead appears in his palm. Surely at this size, Tojirama could never notice. SpongeBob knows that Tojirama is strong, certainly, but not stronger than him. The only advantage he has is his experience with the Sharingan. Tojirama knows how to use the Mangekyou Sharingan proficiently, and SpongeBob has not yet developed a perfect Susanoo, nor has he mastered Amaterasu. He knows how to do Tsukuyomi, but surely someone of Tojirama's class would not dare look in his eyes.

"You stupid fucking brat. You have no right to speak to me in such a manner. Perhaps I'll be the one to kill you. We shall see." SpongeBob slowly moves his hand so that it rests on Tojirama's thigh. "You're right, I see the error in my ways. I'm sorry." SpongeBob expands the Chidori at the blink of an eye, burning a baseball sized hole into Tojirama's right thigh.

"I told you old man. You had adequate warning and yet, you still choose to be insolent. Pathetic."

SpongeBob squats down to the floor where Tojirama lays, bleeding out. He prostrates himself and leans up on his elbows. For a moment, he almost forgets how ruggedly handsome this man was. He takes Tojirama's chin in his palm, and kisses Tojirama tenderly. If not for the circumstance, sex would immediately follow. Tojirama feels his crustaceous cock grow erect, begging for SpongeBob. Tojirama isn't homosexual, but he finds himself more aroused by SpongeBob's tender kiss than that of any woman. Has he fallen prey to some kind of homosexual Jutsu? Or is SpongeBob's charm so alluring, so tempting, as to erase Tojirama's interest in women?

He pulls away from Tojirama, who was still very eager to engage with SpongeBob's tomfoolery. SpongeBob stands up. "I couldn't let you die without experiencing me, even if only a little." He weaves the Jutsu signs. "Chidori!" He screams as he drives his lightning fist through Tojirama's heart.

Tojirama dies with the memory of SpongeBob's kiss lingering in his mind.