Trusting Me, Trusting Her

i don't need another mum, i want mine back

Chapter 4

Instead of driving to Fowey Estuary, Kayla decides to take us to Coulson Park, just a couple of blocks away from my home. I laugh to myself, thinking she probably didn't want to waste petrol money driving us all the way there just for me to have a panic attack and demand to be taken home. They're a little quiet at first; I haven't spoken to them since that night, after all.

'I used to come here to smoke pot when I was younger,' Kayla blurts out of nowhere, when we all fold out of the little car. It's paint shimmers red in the afternoon sun, the asphalt beneath it steaming. We laugh loudly in response, like friends do. 'I only packed it in once I joined the track, I couldn't risk losing my scholarship to Loughborough.'

'That's where you want to go?' I ask, politely. 'It has a great track program; I think Holly was going to do that until she picked up Biology.'

'True! I can't believe you remember that! I told you that when we were at Fowey River,'

'A good friend never forgets!'

'Oh good, because I was wondering if you remember my old Instagram password..'

The banter continues and we're slowly becoming more accustomed to each other's company. I am grateful for Holly and her ability to talk her way through any awkward encounter. Relaxed, Kayla and Amir are sitting on the top of the bench, rather than the seats, chatting amicably about their other subjects and wishes for the future. I'm at a loss with that one.

The sun is just starting to set when the air takes on a thick, stifling tone. The wind starts to pick up a little bit in the trees. I think back to this morning, about the weather warnings issued on the college campus and I frown, thinking about my twins.

'Hey, did you guys know there's supposed to be a storm tonight?' Amir asks, effectively beating me to it. He sniffs the air like a hound before his grey eyes settle back on mine. 'Can you feel it, in the air?'

'I definitely could this morning,' I shrug. In hindsight, I'm not sure how I figured it out. 'The air feels different doesn't it?'

Holly and Kayla look at each other strangely; Amir just nods, his eyes holding mine like stone. It feels like something unspoken has passed between us but before I get the chance to inquire, the wind starts to pick up even more.

'Is it time to go home?' Kayla asks, nervous. She's pulling her black hair between her fingers, curling and then uncurling the perfectly straight strands. 'I don't want to get caught out in one of those,'

'Sure thing,' Holly says, flippant. 'I bet you didn't see this coming, Amir... SHOTGUN!'

He appears confused at first, before her running daunts on him and he sprints to catch up, hating the idea of losing the front seat. Kayla smiles at me.

'You know, you have friends in us, even if you don't want it to be official yet,' she says, 'We're alright, I think. No drama or back-stabbing. If you're anything like Hol, we'll get along just fine,'

I appreciate her pulling me aside to simply be...kind. I don't itch or blush like I used to when I was complemented; I just smile back and nod shortly.

I watch the car, containing my 'friends', pull off and disappear down the street, honking a jingle on the way out which would doubtlessly annoy my neighbours.

Slowly, I tilt my head back and glance at the sky, feeling my mum look down at me and smile. For a brief moment, in the middle of that park, my soul is not connected to my body, I am simply existing in the wind. My senses disengage from me, and the only noise I hear comes from deep within me, deep within my soul.

Southward, toward the water-creek,

Wind creeps- envelopes the battered stone,

And willow leaves. Here you are,

With me; you are constant as the oak tree,

That we find our shade in today,

Southbound, the clouds weep, blackened,

Skies and stormy sheets of rain leak,

Pummell the country.

But here you are, with me. Asleep.

As small and safe as you'll ever be,

For the sun is high and the clouds are neat,

Wherever you will be,

Genevieve.

My eyes shoot open; the skies are cyan in my line of vision. The wind is a howling alarm trying its best to defeat me but it seems I am protected by a shield. Burnt orange leaves swirl in a chasm around me but they can't touch me. My mother is protecting me, I know it and suddenly I am sobbing. Great, heaving sobs that are drowned by the shrill screams of the wind.

For the sun is high and the clouds are neat wherever you will be, Genevieve.

Elio Taylor

When an older sibling takes on too much, too fast... their younger brothers and sisters know. There's not much they can do, aged ten, to ease their suffering, aside from wash the odd dish or fold a few clothes. Whilst Isobel probed and asked questions though, Elio observed.

So when Genevieve comes home looking refreshed and tired in a healthy way, Elio takes a seat and listens in on the girls' conversation.

'Did you make new friends today, Vivi? Does she drive a car? Ooh, how about big school? Have you missed loads of work? I definitely have!'

'I'm not surprised, madam,' Gen fires straight back. Is she giggling? Elio feels his mouth turn upwards when he hears the joy in both of their voices. He missed it. Isobel has that effect on people; she could light up a room with her smile alone.

Dad enters and takes a seat next to his only son; they are so intensely different in appearance, but not so much personality, as they cast a silent approving eye over their remaining family.

With that, Elio grumbles a quick goodbye and shuffles upstairs to his room. Sleep calls him.