Twin Size Matress

A Prologue (I guess)

The world is full of people who despise themselves, in three different, yet mutual ways:

Some beasts believe they aren't enough. They believe all their hard work, their efforts, their achievements, and their failures mean nothing in comparison to anyone else.

They lose their minds over trying to be the best. They want to be the greatest at everything, because they are afraid that if they aren't useful, then they are nothing.

They believe they will be abandoned. Like garbage, or leftovers from last night's dinner.

This is often the case with young herbivores.

Other beasts believe they are too much. They assume their personalities are too difficult to handle. Too complex or annoying for anyone to put up with.

They believe it's best not to speak their truth. They believe that they are just ruining the moment. Or they believe they are a nuisance. A burden. A constant block in the road map to success. A radio that just won't turn off, despite everyone's desperate attempts.

They keep engraved in their minds that they are just a selfish jerk, who needs to be washed away, into the deep sea, so no one could be bothered by them, again.

Carnivores felt like this, in most cases.

For Legoshi, though, he felt both scenarios, every single day. Instead of canceling each other out, though, the two harmful self-images merged into a contradicting heap of a depressive mess.

It never made sense to the young wolf, really. Then again, nothing ever did, these days.

Despite struggling on his own for a while now, and being expelled from school, he honestly felt he had no right to feel bad. He could have it worse. He wasn't homeless, yet. And he could afford food at least once a day. That was more than many struggling beasts his age could even dream of.

Louis, after leaving the Shishigumi, had been out on his own, too. He couldn't turn to his father for help anymore, and from the last of what Legoshi heard, the poor deer was struggling mentally and physically.

Legoshi never blamed Louis. Of course the older one was struggling. The nineteen year old had part of his leg bit off no less than nine months ago, was used as a pawn for some stupid gang, and had to leave everything and everyone behind.

In comparison, Legoshi was doing quite well.

Many times, the young wolf considered reaching out to his friend, but quickly changed his mind. What would he do? What would he say? He couldn't just send a long vent about how he hated the neighborhood, or how the leaking faucet annoyed him. He couldn't strike up a conversation about how variety store food wasn't as tasty as it used to be, or go on and on about how despite being in a building where people fight night and day, it still felt lonely.

Those were problems for the mentally weak. The selfish ones. Louis was nothing of the sort, and probably would feel bad hearing Legoshi complain about the minor issues of life.

So, Legoshi had ignored all his Beastbook messages for months. He hadn't said a word to anyone, nor did he even check posts or stories. He completely shut off from social media. He never sent one like or email. If he did, he'd mess up. He'd explode and tell everyone everything, adding unnecessary stress.

He stayed quiet.

That all eventually changed when he got an email from Vineyard District School Board.

It was an acceptance letter to their university, which he had applied to a while back. Vineyard was run by the same beasts as Cherryton, and was essentially the same school, but at a higher education level. Many students who attended Cherryton attended Vineyard following graduation.

It was strange..Legoshi hadn't been in school for a while, and with his fresh criminal record, he didn't think he had a chance for a financially stable job, let alone obtaining a higher degree of education. He didn't even apply for any classes either, assuming he'd never get accepted ar initial intake, anyway.

He was almost certain it was a joke that someone had sent him. Either that or a scam. Yet, he found himself clicking the link in the email, anyway.

It was no joke, nor was it a scam. It was a legit scholarship. A miracle, perhaps. There was a list of school supplies, offered classes, and everything. They even had digital paperwork, to get ahead of everything. There were resources too. There were clubs for LGBTQ+ students, an Herbivores only club, free student therapists for troubled youth, and even an outreach team for those struggling with meat and drug addictions.

The school was clearly accepting and understanding. Progressive, even.

Legoshi had always wanted to get higher education. He wanted to study more subjects, and perhaps even become a social worker or teacher.

Many things were in the way of this, but now, with a school granting him an exception, he had a chance!

Even if it was miniscule.

Scrolling down the email, Legoshi discovered that his orientation and tour of the university was to be had on the following Wednesday, and that they would have a first year be his tour guide.

Not only that, but he wouldn't be alone. He'd be with a bunch of other new students taking a tour. They even had a list of students' first names.

Carefully, Legoshi read the list, in case he would recognize anyone.

The list went

Maya E. (Chihuahua)

Zeus L. (Pomeranian)

Fenneko Q. (Fennec Fox)

Louis R. (Red Deer)

Retsuko P. (Red Panda)

Gorii W. (Gorilla)

Tadano I. (Donkey)

There were many more to the list, but Legoshi stopped and scrolled halfway back up, when he saw "Louis R. ( Red Deer)."

It couldn't be the same Louis, right? There must have been at least five other Louis' in the city, and all of them could be deers, for all he knew.

Then again, Vineyard was only open to ex Cherryton students, and students from only one other school.

Maybe it was the Louis he knew, after all. If that was the case, things certainly were going to be awkward on Wednesday.

Legoshi decided to send a quick message, asking Louis if he was going to Vineyard, in September. When the gray wolf didn't get a reply, he closed the app, and went to sleep, hoping he'd get a response in the morning.

He felt extremely horrible and awfully selfish for waiting months to talk to anybody. He felt even worse that the first message he sent was only a few words.

Soon, though, he'd find out that Louis didn't mind. Not at all.