My high school life

Chapter 3: Who am I pt 1

Btw Sorry guys for not giving the girl HER personality in the last chapter. I just wanted to focus on Alex for that one. Hope you guys like this!

It's the start of November.
As time's gone on I've felt very odd. Not like a sick odd but like an uncomfortable odd. Whenever the girls start spreading rumours about me, normally I couldn't care less but lately whenever I hear them I feel like crying. I also feel like I don't really have my emotions anymore. Looking back on Halloween and Alex, I noticed that I was just so sweet, almost like a doll. It didn't feel like me.

Even my family has noticed it as well. It's like I changed into the mindless girls I hate. I've even been dressing differently for some reason. I used to wear dark and sometimes boyish stuff but now I've started to wear pink! Yes pink, the one colour I never wear. The moment I realised it, I went to tell the guys at school.

"Hey, guys." I asked them "Have I been acting odd lately?".
"Not really" Sebastian replied" But your not the same as you were when we met you".
"Sebastian!" Robert warned "Don't be so blunt all the time!"
"But to be honest, I don't like her this way. She isn't as smart or brave or blunt as she was before" Sebastian said quite angrily, it was the first time I heard him like that.
"I knew it!" I whispered to myself "I have to see what made me act like this".

I was slightly sad at what Sebastian said, but then it annoyed me that I was sad in the first place because normally I wouldn't be sad!
I went home and checked to see if something had changed. Nothing in my room, nothing in my house, and nothing in my neighbourhood had changed. I went to school fed up because I couldn't find what was making me so soft.

I went home to find a pile of dishes at the sink. I normally wash them but I haven't been doing it as often ever since I started school.
"Zara, the dishes have been piling up!" My mother roared. "You need to start doing your chores again!"
"Not now mom" I said quite rudely without realising.
"What's happened to you?" She said sadly "ever since you went to that school, you've just been so ...... useless".

I was shocked at her words. "Have I changed that much?" I thought to myself. My mother had never said that to me before. I then realised how rude I had been towards my family lately. I haven't done my chores at all. I haven't even been paying much attention when I'm doing my homework! What's happened to me? How did I change so much? Then it hit me. What happened to me on the first day? I was made into their possession. When did I start to change? When I started school.

"It's all those guy's fault!" I shouted to myself "This all happened because I became their freaking play toy!" I was shocked at my words. I hadn't cursed in a long time. I felt like I was right, I knew I was right but what should I do about it? "Tomorrow, let's act how I normally do and see if what happens!" I whispered to myself as it was evening and I didn't want to seem like a weirdo who talks to herself.

I wore my favourite black jeans and a light blue t-shirt which I hadn't worn in a while to see how they would react. It was Saturday so we met at the centre.
"Hi,....Zara?" Jake said looking very surprised. Sebastian had a really big smile on his face, which really surprised me.
"Zara, you look great!" He happily said with a big smile on his face. This surprised everyone including me. I was speechless.
"Come on let's go" he grabbed my hand and dragged me into the centre.

"Hey, wait up" Kyle shouted and everyone ran after us. I had loads of fun! We went to the cinema, then to the gaming centre, then we went to the park. Sebastian looked so interested and it made me so happy, but the other guys didn't seem to be having much fun. When Sebastian went home, the other guys had a chat with me.

"What's wrong" Alex asked "You seem different".
"This is my personality" I cried feeling a bit rejected "I was always like this".
"I know but are you happy like that?" Anthony inputted.
"What?" I replied.
Henri held my hand and asked
"Zara, are you happy being like this?".

I pulled my hand away. "I was always like this, I'm a better person like this" I shouted spitefully at them"You can't just try to change me because you think I'm your freaking play toy!" I tried to storm off but David grabbed my hand. "Zara, if you want to stay like this or if you want to change is fine with me, as long as you are happy, I'm happy" he smiled at me which made me calm down a bit.

"Thank you" I muttered. I put my hand on top of his and stared at him. "Bye".
"Bye Zara" He said with a calming smile on his face which made my heart flutter a bit. On the bus I regretted shouting at them but I was really angry at what Henri said. "Am I happy being like this" What is this, what am I. When I went home, I cried myself to sleep. What am I? Who am I?