Saeloun Sijag 새로운 시작) New Beginnings

21

"Hey" She said in a low voice.

I went near, kept my purse on the table.

I was about to hug her but I decided to lock the door first. after locking I turned around to see her looking at the ground.

"How come you're here?" She asked and held my hands.

I smiled looking at her. I know she's giving me a fake smile. I can see her emotions through her eyes. I don't need her to tell me that she's not fine I know it and I will be there for her.

"Hyejin told me" I said and she understood.

i cupped her face with my hand and it took not a second, she shook my hand away from her face and immediately pulled me in a tight hug.

I wrapped my arms tightly around her, stroking her back slowly to comfort her.

"Stay like this" She said in a muffled voice as she buried her face in my neck.

after a few minuted I felt she calmed down as her very tight grip around me loosened a bit. She did not break the hug she just loosened the grip as she might have realized how tight she was holding me. I was thankful to god for that move.

I felt dampness on my neck and the cloth area which covered my shoulders.

It surely tickled and was not a pleasant feeling.

"want to speak? Or should we stay like this only?" i asked her.

she sniffed and said

"I'll speak but I want to stay like this only." She said.

"Okay baby" I agreed to her.

"I told you not to get over-stressed. See now you're crying like a baby after shouting at others." I said to her. 

"I am so frustrated by all this. No one does their bare minimum here and me and hyejin work our assess off for this project. I know I am not supposed to shout on them but how am I supposed to just stand and tolerate their mistakes?! I also want this to end neatly and quickly. I want to spend time with my child but I cannot because of the careless attitude of these people. It's so much of work. I work here all the time...sometimes I have to rush to the office for some meeting. I come home drained, you both are asleep I don't even have the energy when I reach home that I just slump on the bed. I am so tired of this. I've never felt this before but I guess now since I have Joo won as my responsibility the guilt of not giving him time keeps eating me up!"  She let out everything.

I held her shoulders and made her look at me. I kissed her forehead and she again started crying.

"I miss us! I miss this with you sooo much!!! I want to spend time with my family. I know Won hates me now because I am not able to meet him. He must be thinking how bad mother I am. You must be very exhausted right? you have to look after him alone all day" She said. I also got emotional. Why does this girl every time bottle her emotions! I controlled my emotions cause I want to be the stronger one for now. 

"Nooo....honey, look at me" I cupped her face.

"Joo Won will never hate you. You are doing this for us and we are grateful. It's just that you need some break and man, I am taking you off from some projects. It's too hectic. Look at yourself, bags under your eyes, weight loss.....you need to be healthy for yourself, for ME, for OUR child. Promise me you will take care of yourself more?" I consoled her

"Yes" She said and looked down again tears running from her eyes.

"Aigoooo" I wiped her tears and hugged her. I stroked her back to calm her down.