Only You(BEING RE-WRITTEN)

chapter 8

Leah's prov:

I was red as a fucking tomato. That is the only thing that I'm sure of today. My knees are week and I'm trembling while heat is radiating trough my entire body and gorilas are having a wrestling match in my stomach.  That makes sense right? Right?

"Oh God I'm going insane!" I shout and jump on my bead and scream burying my face in my pillow. I needed a stressed out teenage girl moment, I deserve one after the day I've had.

"Hey Leah are you ok?" I hear Seth knock from the other side of the door.

I freeze. Shit can he smell Bella in my room? She came in the window. She....s-h-e...... Wow I never thought I'd say that in my life.

"Uhhh yeah I'm good just.....girl stuff" I grin evily.

"Ewww! So do not want to know!" He squeals very unmanly and I hear his foot steps retreat twords his room.

I look at the cealing and feel a few tears slip out. Today has been the best and worst day of my life. Or worst oh God I don't know.

First my dad dies. I don't think I've cried so much in my life but after crying when I shifted I realized dad wouldn't want us crying like this he'd want us to get that bloodsucker and kill it.

I immediately winced at my words......Bellas name hovering in my mind. I....I can't love her right? Well obviously I don't yet but......I won't ever....a girl......I've never been around gay people before. I've only known about it because I read in magazines of superstars 'coming out' but I've herd way more people making fun of it treating it as if their freeks..........but.....I guess I'm a freek times two know. Lesbian slash werewolf......did I just admit I was a lesbian?
No....Well.....maybe....I've never felt that way I did tonight from just one look at Bella.

She filled that hole in my life....Well made me not think about it. My dad's death.......becoming a monster.....being hunted by vampires........Lesbian?.......finding out I have a vampire imprint? Do I have to tell the pack now? Won't they just reed my mind? No. Bella but one of those things things she said she did for Jacob in my mind to some thoughts would be private.

Is all the story's I was told before falce? Are vampires really not all that bad? Oh God! Will they kill Bella when they find out even though she's trying to save us?  Is she lying and just going to kill us herself..

No! Those thoughts immediately brought tears to my eyes. How could I think that? She was protecting us! She was my imprint how could I doubt her after her telling me everything.....after she held me when I cried...She listened to pain.

I sighed shaking my head lying down, there's just too much thoughts flying around in my head I can't concentrate ......I just need some sleep.

*********

We were gathered in a small clearing in the woods, I was watching the others training in wolf form. I wasn't quite ready yet I told them. I was still getting used to the whole shifting thing. If it wasn't bad enough them all seeing me naked and catching them think about it later but my brother saw me two! Ugh!

To be honest I was irritated, grumpy, adgitated, worried and just plain pissed.

I haven't seen Bella in six days. She wasn't there at my dad's funeral but she left a note for me on my bedside table telling me she had to go but she'd be back soon she'd explain when she came back. With a big red lipstick kiss mark on the bottom corner telling me to keep it safe until she came back. Man did that make me blush. I was sad she wasn't here but we weren't together right? I had no right to demand stuff of her. But dam I'd I didn't feel anxious and worried and.....lonely. I didn't understand that but I did. Like half of me was missing....it wasn't heartbrake......more like longing.