Complicated

Chapter 1

You know how hard it is to love someone who will never love you back. I do.
Hi my name is Niall James Horan and I am in love with Liam. Yes Liam James Payne of One Direction.
No one freaks out for me I am just the useless fifth wheel of One Direction. The ugly, fake blonde, Irish one with no looks.
Yep I do believe this and none boys know I do. Well not for long. I plan to die tonight. I mean none of the fans will care either will the boys. Mangement will just say I died in a car wreck or some dramatic thing like that. My family don't know I am gay and when I die I made a letter for them so they will they will hate me when I die. So right now I am writing a letter to whoever finds me and I am almost finished.
And finished. Let's do this. So my plan is to leave my window open so after dinner with the boys I will tell them I am going to Maddies' house. I will then go out back get the ladder and put it up to my window and go in and do it.
So why don't I go to my room right after dinner. Well I don't want to be found right away and the boys will be checking on me and if I am gone they won't so yeah.
So after I put the window down I go down to dinner with the boys. As I walked into the kitchen three voices chorused "Hey Niall!" "Hey."i reply back as I sit down. "Where is Louis?" I question to the three boys. "Room." Harry instantly replies. "oh."
After I eat a couple pieces of pizza I get up and right before I leave the kitchen I say bye to the boys. "Where are you going?" Zayn questions. "Maddies' house." I say and then quickly leave the kitchen. When I enter the living room I see Louis sitting on the couch watching a football match on the tv. "Harry said you were in ur room." I say while slipping my shoes on. "I was but I got bored and wasn't hungry." , Louis said and then quickly added , "will you cuddle." I giggled my very manly giggle and answered "I can't Louis I am going to Maddie's maybe next time." I answered even though I knew there was going to be no next time. " Okay bye." Louis said. "Bye." I answered and walked out the door. I quickly walked to the back and got the ladder out. I quickly put it against my window. I climbed up to until I was outside my room.
I then quickly got the letter out and laid it out on my bed with all my razors except one. I then when to my bathroom. When I stood in front of the body length mirror I took off my jacket that uncovered my arms that were littered with old and new scars. I then took off my shirt and looked at it in disgust no reason Liam doesn't like me back I am so fat and ugly. I looked away from the mirror I slowly raised the razor to my wrist pressing it harder to my skin and swiped it across my arm making a deep cut. I did that about 8 more cuts each deeper than the one before. I could see the blood flowing out of the cuts. Before long I could see black dots dancing across my line of vision. the last thing I saw before I lost consciousness was somebody running in with tears rolling down thee face.

A/N
So this is the first chapter of Complicated. It is 620 words I know it is kinda short but lengths of the chapters will vary so yea. I also know that it sucks so yea. Bye Ya peeps!!