our what if's

It's a regular day. Just finished a kdrama series in 16 hours. Don't ask me how, I just did it.

Now, here's the thing. Would it be possible... if those stories happened in real life with a sad ending?

What if after their happy ending, they did not end well on their world?

I'm considering it because I know we are in the reality. No take twos, no edits, no stuntmans, no second chances-- well maybe in other ways, we have.

Sigh.

Would it be possible if those uncanny plots... happen in real life?

Time flies so very fast. On day it's January, one day it's March. On a different year.

I lied down on my bed at 4:30 pm. I have to rest since I need to work later at night. Kind of motivated, cause pay day is tomorrow. But then, what would happen next?

After I spend the money to pay the bills, I'm left with a penny, and have to wait until the next 15 days to receive my salary and spend it again on bills and so on and so forth. Ordinary.

My life's boring, tho. Can't even properly taste my food. Can't smell well. It happened after I got tested positive with... you know. I don't know if it's a side effect after getting infected, there's no scientific explanation yet, but I bet.

Ugh. What makes it worse is being isolated, or should I say "staying safe at home". Hahaha. I can't even visit my cousin whose house is very near, nor go out with my friends regularly. It's either we don't have money, we're busy, or we can't go out.

Life's been like that for 2 years already. Today, is February 3, 2022.

I have a lot of questions in my head. I have a lot of thoughts, making me go sentimental everytime I think of it. Sometime's my world just stops and I think about those and the possible answers.

Who knows? I might think of a solution to end my misery and live a very peaceful and simple life.

By the way, my name is Jane, and I am the main character of this story.

Am I real? Am I not? I don't know.

What I certainly know is that...

I have to find the answer of my what if's.