Her Only Light | Leafpool x Crowfeather

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Leafpool's fear began to rise as Hollyleaf opened her mouth. Please! Don't reveal it, please, she thought miserably. Her paws were trembling and she couldn't keep them stable, which her friend, Mothwing from RiverClan, stared at her, curiosity and worry in her gaze.

"You think you know me– me and my brothers, Lionblaze and Jayfeather! But you thought wrong. Our parents aren't Squirrelflight and Brambleclaw!" Hollyleaf announced. Tensions rised up. Oh no, oh no... Leafpool cried in her mind.

"What?" Brambleclaw asked, his gaze flitting to Squirrelflight. "What does she mean, Squirrelflight?" he demanded. Leafpool could hear protests, shouts, and curious murmurs spark in the Clans. "Let Hollyleaf tell them," Squirrelflight rasped, "I've kept the secret for too long. I won't reveal it now." Brambleclaw looked dismayed. "What–"

"Coward!" Hollyleaf interrupted. "Our real parents were ashamed of us, so they gave us away! Guess who our real parents are. Leafpool and Crowfeather– yes, Crowfeather from WindClan, are our birth parents! They broke the warrior code and they birthed us! Squirrelflight lied to her Clan– and every cat from all the Clans! She lied. They all lied! They all broke the warrior code! They deserve to be punished!" Hollyleaf scrambled to her paws, and dashed to the tree-bridge.

Leafpool felt eyes burn into her pelt. Many, many, many pairs of eyes. Furious yowls splitted the air. Angry retorts were flying. Everything was a mess... because of her.

Suddenly, a familiar feeling overwhelmed her. Crowfeather. Crowfeather's gaze was right on her. She didn't move. She wanted him to stare at her forever, but not in disgust. That was unlikely to happen. Leafpool kept this from him too.

"I can't believe you!" Leafpool overheard Nightcloud spat. "No, it's a lie! Who do you believe– your mate or a random warrior in a different Clan that has gone rogue?" Crowfeather's shame was obvious, Leafpool could see, but he still kept his head proud.

Nightcloud glared at him. "Well you aren't my mate anymore!" Leafpool pushed her way to Crowfeather and Nightcloud– Breezepelt, Crowfeather's son was near, watching with anger.

"It's true..." she mewed, her voice full of despair. "There is no denying it." Leafpool stared into the depths of Crowfeather's blue eyes... She realized that his eyes had anger, but also... affection? Affection for her? She wondered.

"I never want to see you again!" Nightcloud hissed bitterly, and she padded to Breezepelt, keeping her tail high, and the two cats– mother and son, both left the area.

The other cats around had too. "Leafpool..." Crowfeather murmured. "Why didn't you tell me?" His voice was full of love– love that Leafpool didn't deserve. "I–I couldn't. StarClan told me not to..." she stammered.

Crowfeather looked as if he was going to send her a retort, but he bit his lips, and his warm eyes told Leafpool he wasn't angry anymore... or maybe, he never was.

"I understand." Crowfeather looked away as if he was considering whether to understand– or not. "I could've helped you though. But... perhaps I'm not as important anymore to you."

Leafpool's hackles rised in protest. "No..." she said confidently, but it barely came out as a whisper. "You are important to me... You are everything to me." Her voice was full of love and affection undeniably.

Crowfeather didn't say anything, but he turned around, his gaze on Leafpool, and his pelt touching with hers now. Leafpool didn't regret her words. Everything she hoped for, she had before, was gone now that everybody knew.

Finally, Crowfeather mewed, "You are everything to me too." In those loving words, Leafpool suddenly understood everything he did. Why he became mates with Nightcloud– why he treated his own son so badly– and why he had denied his relationship with his kits in ThunderClan.

It was all for him to try to gain happiness that would never be true in his heart.

"I still love you." Leafpool confessed. "I know it's wrong..." By now, all her clanmates and Crowfeather's were gone. They had left them. Maybe they were being kind, letting them rekindle, or maybe they hoped that they'll shred each other to pieces.

"I love you too." Crowfeather breathed, his warm scent engulfing the ThunderClan medicine cat. "I wish there were a way to be with each other..." Leafpool's voice was low, but warm. "I wish that too." Crowfeather said. "I had wished for that." Leafpool paused. What does he mean by "had"?

"Now we have a way," Crowfeather announced, "Our clanmates hate us now. They won't care if we leave." Leafpool stood in shock. She had processed this information when her kits had borned, in case the Clan found out, but she was shocked to hear Crowfeather voice it.

"I can't..." Leafpool murmured softly. "Look what happened last time. Cinderpelt... she died because of me." Crowfeather's flank brushed against hers. "It wasn't your fault. And this time, ThunderClan has Jayfeather, our kit." Crowfeather himself seemed astonished that he even acknowledged his kit as... his kit.

"What if something happens to him?" Leafpool blurted. "Who would be ThunderClan's medicine cat?" She bit her lip as her echoing thoughts many moons ago bit her. Brightheart.

"No," Leafpool said. "I have a better idea." Her idea was terrible, but it was worth it if she could be with Crowfeather.

"What is it, my love?" Leafpool's breathing started to pick up a pace as Crowfeather called her "my love".

"I will join WindClan." Leafpool decided.