AN: First I wanna give a HUGE shoutout to SilvanaSuheiCarrillo for inspiring me with her wonderful story and I strongly recommend supporting both her art and stories. I'm serious you need to read Helluva Dad you won't regret it. All credits go to her.
But enough of this lets get it on.
Murder Family
Millie: Moxxie, stop shaking. You're gonna shoot our only hellhound!
[Loona lies on a gray couch using Hound lap as a foot holder and holds up the family picture in one hand and her phone in the other while Hound plays on his game console. On the wall are drawings of Blitzo in a horse shape and a drawing of Robo Fizz with an arrow sticking out from it.]
Loona: [sarcastically] Wow, I feel so loved here.
Hound: At least they acknowledge that you are here.
Striker: If this were real, he'd already been dead.
Millie: You're not helping, Striker. [Growling]
Hound: Don't know about you Mills but that seems pretty helpful to me, specially if someone is being a fucking wimp.
Moxxie: I'm not a wimp!
Hound: Oh really? Do I need to remind you that this kid over here [Pointing at Jake] killed the hog that you were supposed to in order to impress your wife's family? And he was only 4 years old?
Moxxie: I-
Millie: Anyway! Just take a deep breath, [inhales] and let it out.
Moxxie: But, it's a family. Under what circumstances would we ever need to kill a human family?
Millie: I mean, if that's what the client wants.
Moxxie: Maybe if is like a shitty dad. Or a mob family. [Speaking with a stereotypical Italian accent] That' s understandable. [Speaks normally] But to eradicate an entire innocent—seemingly in this instance—upper middle class family bloodline?
[Loona looks at the picture as she thinks for a moment.]
Loona: Hey! You don't know they're innocent. [Points to the boy] This kid probably sets dogs on fire.
Hound:[Points to the girl] Maybe this girl gets off to bullying Australian kids online.
Jake: [Points to the father] And this guy... this guy definitely watches.
Loona: Couldn't have said it better, little guy.
Hound: Nice one pup.
[The hellhounds shared a fist bump with the impling.]
Spring Broken
Blitzo: Do you have any questions?
Jake: [Raising hand] What does orgy mean?
[Striker spat his mouthful of coffee right into Moxxie's face while the others exchanged nervous glances. Blitzo cleared his throat awkwardly. Hound tries and fails to contain his inmense laughter.]
Striker: [Grabbing the impling shoulders] Where did you learn that word?!
Jake: One of Verosika Mayday's songs is called 'Orgy' and I got curious.
[Hound puts an arm around Jake.]
Hound: Listen here pup that word means that when a bunch of horny people are together they-
[Hound listens a gun click behind his back and sees Striker giving him a "Don't you fucking dare!" while aiming his revolver.]
Hound: [Clears throat] It's actually something that you'll learn when you are older and have the mental maturity for it. [Chuckles nervously.]
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[One of the nearby barrels wobbled. Striker tipped it over with a kick, spilling out the remaining beer as well as two familiar imps.]
Hound: Holy shit.
Millie: Moxxie!
Striker: Jake!
Moxxie: Millieee! Hey, when did you get four heads? I wanna kiss 'em!
Striker: Jake? Are you okay, kiddo? [Grabs him by the shoulders] . Answer me, boy!
Jake: Hey, daddy! [hiccups.] This water's soo tasty! Can I have more?
Striker: [Rubbing his temple.] Wonderful. My kiddo's drunk and he's only nine.
Hound: How many beers did you have Jake?
Jake: Eleventeen.....
Hound:[Smirking] I need to record this [Pulls out phone] This is fucking gold right here.
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C.H.E.R.U.B
Hound: Jake can you please come out? The tour bus leaves in 5 minutes and I'm not paying twice for those fucking expensive tickets.
Jake: I'm not coming out!
Striker: Would you stop makin' a fuss? Nobody you know will see you.
Jake: You guys can and that's more than enough for me!"
Hound: [Taps on his wrist] Striker we are running out of time.
[Striker rolls his eyes, reached his hand into the bush, and pulled his Jake out. Moxxie snickered while Millie made a loud awing sound. Hound starts to pull his phone out, Hound was using his human disguise, Millie and Moxxie picked simple wigs and human clothing, Striker wore an all-black costume of a fictional character known as Zorro, with a cape, hat, and everything. However, Jake was dressed in a cute sailor outfit and a blonde wig with braids. The impling's arms were crossed and there was an unhappy pout on his face.]
Millie: Aww, Jakey, you look adorable!
Jake: I look like a little girl!
[Jake hears a camera snap and turns around to see Hound taking a picture with a huge grin.]
Hound: Loona is gonna fucking love this.
Jake: HEY! [Lunges at Hound trying to take away his phone.]
That's all for now see you next chapter ;)
