Hi yeah I'm fourteen. I'm not thinking about virginity yet. It's in an unopened box off in the corner of my brain, waiting for a special guy to show up with on of those exacto knives to cut it open. Like four years from now. I'm good thanks. But there's kids like
Omg, just lost my v-card. #noviginity
And I'm over here, in a dark corner like
Shoo. I do not like humans.
Seriously people. Seriously. Like woah. Next thing I know, everyone's pregnant, and I'm laughing my ass off like
HAHA WISH U WAITED NOW HUH
I feel so awesome. I mean, if you loose your virginity, you can't really be fat, right? Cause you gotta look good to get "laid," as people so garishly call it. So yeah, okay. You clearly don't want pizza. I'll just deliberately wave it in your face. Then stuff it into my face. Then a cupcake. Mmmm, bacon.
Wait, what was I talking about?
