Evergreen - Cruella/Estella x Reader (GXG)

Embrace

(Back to reader POV )

Months had passed without her. As time went by it got a little easier, but every so often thoughts of her would find me again, creeping up on me like a shadow on a dark night. Though I still yearned for her, I would be lying if I said I hadn't began to resent her slightly. Every day I asked myself why she left. I thought there may have been a reason for it and I felt she at least owed me an explanation. But I began to accept that I would never get an answer to that question, regardless of how much it consumed my thoughts.

I often found myself hanging around near the places she had taken me, where the memories of her lived on. Secretly I was hoping to bump into her on the off chance. I thought even just seeing her again would give me the closure I needed. But I never did. She was gone. I needed to accept it, to try to move on.

Whilst I spent the majority of my time in my flat mending my broken heart, the rest of the country continued to be fascinated with the mysterious Cruella woman. She had certainly made an impact that's for sure. She was everywhere, in the newspaper, on the radio, on the TV, and on the cover of pretty much every magazine. She was hard to escape. She was bold and beautiful. She had a mischievous and devilish quality that everyone seemed to be drawn to – nobody more than me. She still reminded me so much of Estella and I had absolutely no idea why.

When I heard about the fashion riot in Regents Park I couldn't help but grow a little suspicious. The fountain that Estella had taken me too was now the very same place that the mysterious Cruella was holding her first ever fashion show. That seemed a little too much of a coincidence, but once again I tried to convince myself it was just my mind overthinking. The newspapers had labelled her  a criminal, a vandal and worst of all a cold-hearted puppy killer. As cruel as Estella was for leaving me without so much as an explanation, I was certain she was none of those things. In fact she was the polar opposite. The very idea of Estella being her seemed utterly ridiculous. 

The news of Cruella's death came as quite a surprise to everyone. I was sat at my kitchen table with a cup of tea when I heard the news of the tragic warehouse fire. It was a dull morning, the woollen grey clouds lay across the sky like a blanket. Hearing the news gave me a strange feeling of uneasiness. Reminders of losing my Mum and Brother hit me like a wave. I decided to go for a walk to clear my head.

As I walked through the city streets there seemed to be a still sadness in the air that affected the whole city. I sat near the River Thames gathering my thoughts, watching as it gracefully flowed under the bridge whilst listening to the gentle hum of the passing traffic.

I hadn't been home long before I heard the knock on my door.

I opened the door and there she stood. Her messy hair was tied up in a bun. Loose strands that fell beside her face which was shadowed by the hat she wore in an attempt to to disguise herself. I could see the sadness in her eyes as she stood there with a single tear rolling down her cheek. She looked so fragile and upset. For a second I thought I was dreaming, but I knew instantly it was Estella. Her hair might have been different but her green eyes still had the same enchanted glint in them. I stood there for a moment in shock and confusion.

"Y/N" She said with a shaky voice, as if she were about to burst into tears.

I shook my head in response. I had spent endless hours rehearsing this moment in my mind.  I wanted so desperately to hold her, to kiss her, to whisper in her ear how much I had missed her. But she had hurt me so much. How could she just turn up on my doorstep out of the blue and expect everything to be okay?

Without any thought, I slammed the door shut. My body trembled and my fragile heart began to pound. I was suddenly overwhelmed with all sorts of emotions that hit me like a hurricane. I thought I wanted an explanation from her, to hear her side of the story, but as she stood on the other side of that door, all I could feel was anger, pain, sadness all intertwined in one.

She knocked the door again. "Please Y/N, hear me out, open the door."

"Go away Estella." I muttered in response as I fought every urge to do as she requested and open the door.

For a moment there was nothing but silence. I thought for a second she might have actually left. 

"Please Y/N don't be like that" She responded as her voice cracked. "I am begging you, let me in please. I need to tell you something."

I could feel the tears now rolling down my cheek as so many conflicting thoughts ran through my mind.  I could tell she was upset, that she was hurting. But I was too – she had hurt me in unimaginable ways and now she just expected my forgiveness and to crawl back into my life as if nothing had happened.

"I don't want to hear it. Just go ."

"I am not going anywhere. I will wait here all night if I have to. So you may as well just open the door." She cried. Her voice now broken and raspy.

Another deafening silence fell between us as I contemplated what to do. My heart was telling me to open the door, my head was telling me to tell her to leave

"I know you're upset with me, Y/N. But please you have to let me in. I need you."

"Upset with you?! That is a bit of a fucking understatement. You left me without even saying goodbye. You didn't bother to so much as even call me to explain why you left. You effectively abandoned me and now months later you're standing on my doorstep with a new haircut, which I have noticed by the way, expecting to just walk back in here and for me to forgive you as if nothing has happened. No Estella, if that is even your name, that isn't how it works." I yelled in response.

I could feel my face flush as I let out the resentment that had been boiling up inside me for months. All I had wanted for months was for her to tell me she needed me, that she wanted me, and now she was finally here, saying what I wanted to hear and I wasn't able to control my anger towards her. I was so conflicted.

"I know, it was a shitty thing to do. I am sorry Y/N." She muttered through the door.

"It's a bit late for that now" I interrupted her, still feeling the effects of my anger.

"I didn't want to leave you, but I had to, you have to believe me. I am sorry, I really am.  I can explain everything, I promise. Just let me in please." She begged now audibly sobbing.

Hearing her cry made my heart feel heavy and created an overwhelming feeling of guilt in the pit of my stomach. I thought shouting at her would make me feel better. It didn't. Knowing that my words hurt her caused me the most unimaginable pain ever. So much so that I took pity on her and opened the door.

I stood there momentarily and just stared at her. She looked distraught standing there. Her face was red and blotchy as the tears streamed down her face. Her eyes were bloodshot emphasising the intensity of their green colour. My eyes welled up at the sight of seeing her so upset.

She looked at me with her tearful eyes and instantaneously clung to me embracing me tightly. I could feel her shaking as I held her in my arms. I silently kissed her head as a tear ran down my face.

"I've missed you" She whispered breathlessly between her cries.

"I've missed you too" I gently squeezed her, holding her a little closer in response.

For a moment everything went silent and we just stood there in one another's arms, holding each other closely.

AN- I hope you liked it. PS. Yes, you guessed it, I am still Simping for Cruella.

Love B x