Ended Up With Color Blue

EPILOGUE

Epilogue

There is only one happiness in this life, to love and to be loved.

The most painful part of my life was witnessing the important people in my life lose their breath. I don't know where I will get the strength to rise again from falling.

I've been lost before because of my mom’s death. I carried it until I grew up. I once asked myself why I didn’t make the most of my time with mommy. I was broken into pieces, I lost my way. I used to bully every student, and fight everywhere. There was no certainty in my life then, no one could change me then.

But our paths met. I never thought that every day, time I see and spend time with her would be a reason for someone like me to change. I used to think she was just an ordinary girl, but I was wrong because every time she approached me there were colours that enveloped my personality.

She used to be my painter. I still remember every word she uttered that encouraged me, she also made me smile. Back then, I used to think that I could no longer find a light that would give me the light to the right path.

She's the only woman who gave me light, it became my hope when I was trapped in darkness. She saved me, even though she didn’t know she was my hero. But not all stories have a happy ending, like the story of the two of us.

Pinagtagpo lamang kami para sa isang bagay. Hindi ba pwedeng manatili na lamang siyang buhay? Until now I still can't forget what happened. I hope everything is just a dream, because until now I can't see myself without her. 

She was the reason why I love being a photographer. She is the woman I ask from the Lord everyday I pray but… she's gone. I don’t see myself loving anyone else again.

My knees are weakening to bend where Jazure is buried, nakauwi na sila tita at tito. Dahan-dahan kong inilagay ang rose sa lapida niya. Pilit akong ngumiti sa kanya, kahit sobrang bigat ng nararamdaman ko pinilit ko parin ngumiti. 

I didn't realise that my tears were flowing. Some people are right, when you are hurt, you will not feel the tears flowing down in your eyes. I wiped my tears that slid down my cheek. "I'm sorry, I forced you to stay by my side even though it was so hard for you."

"You're a tear that hangs inside my soul forever…" My tears come from my heart and not from my brain.

I closed my eyes as the rain fell, I just closed my eyes until it was raining hard like it was coincidence with this day. My tears kept flowing as water dripped down on my face.

I slowly lifted my face and saw the blurred form of the woman who was now away from me. My chest tightened. "Just wait for me…" was the last word I left out.

I acted okay in the eyes of Dad and my two friends. I don’t want them to worry, they always accompany me when they have free time. I am reminded every day that everything will be okay even if it is not. I want to start again but I don’t know where to start.

I was in front of the window glass, while looking at the sky covered in blue. This is what I do sometimes, staring at the sky daring to see her again even for a moment. I want to tell her that I will love her no matter how long.

Lumapit sa akin si Kuya, kita ko ang pag aalala sa mukha niya. Peke akong ngumiti, nagpapanggap na okay lang ako. He put his hand on my shoulder. "I'm just here…" he said with care.

Weekend na ngayon ang bilis ng araw. Kasama ko sila Ryan at Jacob. Hindi sana ako sasama sa kanila pero pinaghihila nila ako hanggang sa makarating kami sa lugar na palagi naming pinupuntahan. Madilim na ngayon, we could see the lights coming from the houses below.