To the Boy in the Black Hoodie

Prologue

12th December 2021

When my wolrd was thrown off it's axis......

"Say it!" she spoke angrily.

Tears fell from my eyes, I held back a sob. At this point, I could barely breathe, my lips
quivered, I couldn't bring those words out of my mouth. The pain in my chest kept on
increasing with every passing second.

"SAY IT KIA!" she yelled. Her face was red from crying and anger.

I looked at my dad sitting beside her, who was crying as well. Watching the man who never showed any weakness in front of me breakdown right in front of my eyes (reason for that being me), made me want to just wish that I was dead. Hurting them hurt me. Watching them cry killed me a thousand deaths. It felt like someone was torturing me to death and bringing me back to life again just to kill me once more.

I looked down at my brothers, the twins, who were sleeping peacefully. They would've
rained hell if awake. But they both slept like babies. Normally I would've smiled, they were my whole world, but right now, my heart broke seeing them. I swallowed the lump in my throat and prayed that I would sound as sincere as I felt, because I needed all the strength I could muster up while taking this very decision, one that would change my life. It felt wrong, so wrong even thinking about the absence of the person that meant the most.....

Gazing into my parents eyes which held a mixture of anger sadness and grief, god do much grief. I had a decision to make and it had to be done quickly. looking at my brothers i made my decision.

"I swear that I will never look back, nor utter that name. I will never speak of it nor do anything against your wishes." I swore on my brothers who were sleeping. They didn't knew what was happening, and I guess they won't in the future as well. 

The day that changed everything I thought of, the same day where everything ended. Oblivious to the storm, I felt like I just signed my soul to the devil. [And here I thought that I was the one ruling the hell (lol)] Their faces relaxed as they heard it.

"Don't forget your words Kia." mom warned, her lips pursed. her face was red from crying whole day.

"I swore on my brothers. You have my word Ma." I spoke emotionlessly. I would bend all rules to get what I wanted but when it came to my brothers that's were i became weak. The tears which
were falling mere moments ago had disappeared. I felt dead inside. Quite literally. Every emotion ceased to exist, I want to cry or shout but at the same moment I didn't care, I didn't even want to bother expressing any of those.

Ma stared at me with her scrutinizing Lazer sharp eyes which were red from the unshed tears. Her eyes showed uncertainty, anger, disbelief, disappointment but above all betrayal. And that made me want to dig a hole and hide there for eternity and never show my face to anyone ever again. She stood there contemplating before she locked her eyes with dad. His eyes were as red as hers if not more. He looked so unlike him, so unlike the person I am accustomed to seeing. He looked broken. That was like another stab to my heart.

Something transpired between them through their eyes and she sighed before leaving along with dad. None of them looked back. Was I hoping for them to? I honestly don't know at this point I have given up on hoping because it seems like my hopes will be crushed anyways by what my fate has in store for me. So better not hope right?

I fell to my knees. I felt all these emotions, yet I felt nothing at all. One might say I was feeling numb but it wasn't that either. It was like someone had put a blanket on all of my emotions that were going haywire. I knew about the emotions bubbling under the surface but that's all. The intensity was nothing. I just knew they existed I didn't feel those and that, scared me. But then again not being able to feel any of this wasn't new either, this had happened before. Once. And that was the worst nightmare.

Had they asked me to die i would have gladly, but they took away my will to live and expected me to live. How do i do that....?

I looked at the twins sleeping forms and only one question came to my mind, "What the hell just happened?"