Gunner: Bottling up negative emotions is bad for your health, so you shouldn't do it.
Decker: I know, that's why I bottle up all my emotions, both positive and negative, so it cancels out.
Gunner: Th-that's not how that works-
---------------------
Courtney: What does "take out" mean?
Gunner: Food.
Frankie: Dating.
Nikki: Murder.
Decker: It can be all three if you're brave enough
-----------------
Courtney *walks in on Gunner pouring a bottle of syrup into his mouth*: What the fuck is wrong with you??
Decker: What? No good morning?
Courtney: Good morning, what the fuck is wrong with you??
---------------------------------------
Courtney: Frankie, no.
Frankie: Frankie, yes.
-----------------------------
(Had to throw one in that is definitely a shallow dig at Vanessa.)
Vanessa: Tomorrow's garbage day.
Nikki: I can't believe they made a whole day dedicated to you
-------------------------
Nikki: I wanna die.
Frankie: We all do, you aren't special!
------------------------
Nikki: My life isn't as glamourous as my wanted poster makes it look.
--------------------------------------------
Nikki: Go to sleep or you'll hate yourself in the morning!
Decker: I'll hate my self in the morning regardless.
----------------------
Storm: Treat spiders the way you want to be treated.
Nikki: Killed without hesitation.
---------------------------
Courtney: Where are you going?
Storm: To either get ice cream or commit a felony. I'll decide on the way.
---------------------
Gunner: I am your king, long may I reign!
Nikki: Well I didn't vote for you!
Gunner: You don't vote for kings.
Nikki: Well how'd you become king then?
Gunner: Courtney of the Lake, their arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Gunner, was to carry Excalibur. That is why I am your king.
Nikki: Listen. Strange people lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.
---------------
Frankie, with a headache: Advil me up, daddy.
Gunner: I will short out the language centre of your brain if you say anything like that ever again.
------------------------------
Gunner: If you got arrested what would be the charges?
Frankie: Theft.
Storm: Disturbing the peace.
Decker: Aggravated assault.
Nikki: Arson.
Courtney: All of the above. In that order, probably.
(Courtney, lmfao. She is pretty intimidating to talk to though.)
--------------------------------
Courtney: Wait, hold up, why you draw yourself like that?
Frankie: Uh, like what?
Courtney: Like with gorgeous, muscular legs.
Courtney: Uh, this is what I look like.
Courtney:
Frankie: THIS IS WHAT I LOOK LIKE!
Courtney: Okay, then I want big beefy arms. Hot ones.
Nikki: I wanna have a cowboy hat!
Frankie: Okay, arms and hat. *draws them*
Storm: Ooh, give me a cowboy hat too!
Frankie: You can't just take Nikki's hat idea, Storm! They thought it up all by themself like a good person! Come up with your own thing!
Storm: BUT I WANNA LOOK COOL!
Decker: Put Storm on one of those stupid baby tricycles.
Storm: NO!!
Frankie: Tricycle, done. *draws it* Gunner, want anything?
Decker, making finger guns: Pew pew.
Frankie: A blaster?! No, that's not really our style, Gunner.
Gunner, making finger guns: Pew pew.
Frankie: You know what, okay. *draws it* But it's just for holding, not for shooting.
---------------------------------------
Frankie: If you put 'violently' in front of anything to describe your action, it becomes funnier.
Frankie: Violently practices.
Courtney: Violently studies.
Storm: Violently sleeps.
Gunner: Violently shoots pictures.
Decker: Violently boxes.
Nikki: Violently murders people.
Courtney: Violently worries about the previous statement.
-----------------------
*Nikki falls over*
Storm: Dad! Are you alright?
Nikki: Is that you, God?
Storm: What?
Nikki: It's just, you sound a lot more like Storm than I expected.
--------------------------------------------------------------
*Everyone is giving advice to Decker*
Nikki: It's okay to ask for help.
Courtney: You're not a burden.
Storm: Murder is okay.
Gunner: Your feelings matter
--------------------
Gunner: "My dearest belived fuckos" is a fun, gender-neutral way to begin a speech.
Decker: See also: "Esteemed bastards".
Storm: "Gentlefolk, ferals and domesticated Cryptids".
Frankie: "My fellow yees and haws".
(Cue Nikki in the background wishing he could give them all up for adoption.)
------------------
Courtney: My stomach growled super loud in French.
Courtney: I would like to clarify, my stomach did not speak in French. It growled during French class.
Gunner: Bonjour.
Storm: Le growl.
Frankie: Hon hon hon, feed me a baguette.
(Nikki googling if you can give adult children up for adoption)
-------------------------
Nkki: *dies*
Frankie: Timer starts now! When are they coming back? I say two months!
Storm: Bullshit. One month.
Gunner: Nah, half a month.
Courtney, sobbing: WHAT ARE YOU DOING? NIKKI JUST DIED!
Nikki, scratching chin in thought: One week.
-------------------------------------------
*Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker*
Storm: So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know.
Everyone:
Frankie: ...I did. I broke it.
Storm: No. No you didn't. Nikki?
Nikki: Don't look at me. Look at Courtney.
Courtney: What?! I didn't break it.
Nikki: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?
Courtney: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.
Nikki: Suspicious.
Courtney: No, it's not!
Gunner: If it matters, probably not, but Decker was the last one to use it.
Decker: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!
Gunner: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?
Decker: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Gunner!
Frankie: Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Storm.
Storm: No! Who broke it!?
Everyone:
Gunner: Storm... Nikki's been awfully quiet.
Nikki: rEALLY?!
*Everyone starts arguing*
Storm, being interviewed: I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it.
Storm: I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.
Storm:
-----------------------
Gunner: Make her pussy wet not her eyes.
Frankie: Make his dick hard not his life.
Nikki: Break her bed not her heart.
Decker: Play with her boobs not her feelings.
Courtney: Get on his dick not his nerves.
Storm: Always salt your pasta while boiling it.
-------------------
Nikki: Sure, you're verified on twitter, but are you verified in the eyes of god?
-------------------------
YOU ARE READING
Spam book
RandomMy spam book. me and my favorite chicas too. expect lotssss of mothly crue
