TransBoo

13.

enjoy!

tw: unsafe binding, emotional numbness, gender dysphoria ( please tell me if any are missing or wrong, stay safe! )

Ranboo felt pathetic. He was sitting in a dirty bathroom stall, crying, when all his friends were out in the cafe having fun. Probably having more fun than when he was there if he was being totally honest with himself. It was all too much, the pain, being around so many people, being out in public, everything. He had to stop himself from sobbing because to hurt too much so he just let the tears trickle down his cheeks silently, numbly. He kept everything inside until it all bottled up and exploded randomly. After crying for a while, Ranboo wiped his eyes and cleared his throat before unlocking the door of the stall he was in. He stared it himself in the mirror, stared into his slightly red eyes. Quickly fixing his hair and wiping his eyes one last time, Ranboo opened the bathroom door and walked back to the table, plastering a smile onto his face. Ranboo didn't eat anything else, he had been hungry before but now his stomach felt like it was filled with air, something his lungs lacked.

The group finished their meal and payed for their food before heading to Wilbur's studio for a music vibe session. It didn't take them long to get there and soon Ranboo, Tubbo, Tommy and Phil were sitting on the floor, all jamming to the song Wilbur was singing and playing on his guitar. Jack, Scott, Niki and George had gone off to do their own thing for a while before they would all meet again at the beach later that day. When Wilbur finished the song, the rest of them applauded enthusiastically, Phil and Tommy whooping.

"Will, can I play something?" Tommy asked, Wilbur looking at him in slight surprise.

"You want to play something?" Tommy's only response was eager nodding. Wilbur sighed and passed the younger the guitar. He then stepped out of the room to fill up his water bottle from a drinking fountain lower down in the building. Tubbo, Phil and Ranboo stared at Tommy waiting for him to begin playing and Tommy's gremlin fingers began their work. It pained Ranboo slightly as he twanged on the strings and tried to make chords. Somehow, within only a few minutes, Tommy had managed to put all of the strings out of tune. The sounds coming from the instrument pained the others' ears. Eventually Ranboo had enough and spoke up.

"Tommy, Tommy, hand the guitar here, man."

"But I'm making music!" Tommy whined.

"Well, I hate to break it to you but it sounds a bit off, let me tune it before Will yells at you." Tommy thought for a moment and eventually handed the guitar to Ranboo. Gladly, Ranboo began retuning the guitar and it didn't take long for Wilbur to walk back in the door.

"Ranboo you play?" he asked, causing the others to look around. Ranboo shrugged.

"Meh, a bit, I guess?"

"Oh shit, what songs do you know?" Wilbur asked as he took a seat on the floor between Tommy and Phil, completing the circle as Ranboo thought for a moment.

"I don't know actually, I know most of your songs and just a couple ones I thought sounded pretty."

"Wanna play something now?" Ranboo's eyes flicked between the four people looking at him, some of his best friends, and thought fuck it.

"Sure, why not?" Tubbo, Phil and Tommy smiled as Ranboo adjusted himself and thought of a song to play. "Do you know 'It's Not The Same Anymore' by Rex Orange County?"

"I am familiar."

"Do you wanna do the singing? It doesn't sound right without it."

"Why don't you do it, man?" Ranboo bit the inside of his cheek nervously. He had always hated his singing voice, it was too high pitched, more high pitched than his regular talking voice and that was saying something.