Poetry - a way to express [whatever]

BL - a genre, but kind of more

It sounds probably stupid but BL kind of helped me along with some therapy to lessen my anxiety

So, here we go...

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On train, in the shop, at school
Everywhere, everthing was too overwhelming
My brain, my senses too overloaded like I was drowning in a pool
Suppressing was my only tool
But the anxiety was tamed by myself, so far, I was charming

But I wasn't my real self anymore
Until I broke that door
The fake smiles
With which I have accomplished miles

The fear still there
Everywhere
Getting bigger stronger
People are all over the place
No escape, no space

Man
Men
Are evil, cruel, just mean
This is deep anchored down in my mind
Probably this is never gonna change

A step closer, taking courage in spoons
My fear balloons
Getting over with those situations
Swallowing the considerations

Constantly being in fear
This since my sixth year
This is normal, a regular day
Because there is no other way

I started watching BL
Man can have different sides - Feelings?
Vulnerable but not violent
Can be reflective and silent

My world started to change
Day by day
Night by night
On train, in the shop, at school - all in that range

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Hope you have a lovely day

Thanks for reading❤