Locha-E-Ulfat!

5. The Theft!

Four people wearing black jackets and masks were seeing climbing a pipeline. "Aaj toh chori karni hi hogi.", a man said amongst them. "Haan, agar aaj nahi ki, toh pakka mare jayenge. Yeh important documents and papers humare haath aaney hi honge.", the other man replied. All the other three nodded and turned to climb the pipeline. 

"Kahan maine sapne dekhe, apni girlfriend ke liye pipeline climb karoonga. Aur yahan dekho, chori karne ke liye climb karna par raha hai. Not Fair God ji bro!", a man amongst them complained while climbing the pipeline and eventually slipped and landed in the female commando's arms. "Sid, boronta kahin ka. Kahan humne sapne dekho the ki hum criminals aur desh drohiyon ko apni bahon mein kuchalenge, aur ek tere saath, hum tujhe apni bahon mein lekar ghoom rahe hain.", the girl lashed out. 

"Sanju, relax. And please, hum yahan chori karne aye hain thoda dheere bolo. Maine bhi apne sapnon mein kabhi nahi dekha tha ki main boy's hostel ke building ke neeche khade hokar unmein se topper ke kamre mein jaakar chori karooongi.", the other calm and settled girl spoke out. "Agar tum logon ki sapnon par charcha ho gayi ho toh chade pipeline? Ek toh iss mission ke chakkar mein logon ke rakshak se logon ka bakshak banna padh raha hai, chori karni padh rahi hai!", the other focused man of the team hissed in anger and frustration. 

"Lagta hai bhagwan ji bro ko GB ji bro bohot acche lagte the. Tabhi toh iss Dole Shole urf Karan bro ko uske doosre form mein bhej diya!", Sid uttered and quickly started to climb the pipeline avoiding Karan and Sanjana's death glares. "GB matlab Ghiyasuddin Balban, just in case you were wondering.", Monu updated the two. The other three soon climbed the adjacent pipelines till Sid's level. "Do batein.", Karan started while Monami in reflex raised her fingers and was about to fall when she held the pipeline in time. "Monami, samay aur jagah toh dekh liya kar.", Sanju giggled. 

Monami rolled her eyes and while Karan continued, "Pehli baat, I am not your bro. Doosri, Ghiyasuddin Balban Delhi Sultanate ke time par apne courtiers ko smile rak nahi karne deta tha, unse apni naak zameen par uske saamne ghisne ko kehta tha. Main toh phir bhi tum logon ko apna namuna-pan dekhane deta hoon. Toh mujhe toh usse compare bilkul bhi mat karo. Agar woh GB yahan hota na, toh abhi tak tum log yamraj ke bhainse par heaven ki aur prasthan kar chuke hote.", Karan finished. 

"Do batein.", Sid tried to imitate Karan but failed terribly making the other two girls laugh out while Karan gestured them to be silent to which they realised the situation and silently chuckled. Ignoring the mocking laughs and giggles of the girls' Sid continued, "Firstly,  What's Yamraj and Prasthan? And secondly, how are we supposed to travel to heaven through a buffalo?", Sid asked extremely confused. 

The other three felt like banging their head against the pipelines. The preferred to ignore Sid and his questions and continue climbing the pipelines leaving an offended Sid to climb the pipeline as well. 

***

The four stood in the topper's room ready to faint on spot. There was a swimming pool of books in the bathtub of the washroom. The topper seemed to be in coma under the pile of handouts fallen and spread upon him while he was mumbling a 'law' in his sleep. The table was covered with the scribbling of calculations which were also present of the walls and the floor. 

"Lagta hai paper ki kami ho gayi thi, tabhi panch saal ke bacche ki tarah idhar udhar drawings bana rakhi hain.", Karan whispered looking at the scribblings. "Yeh drawings nahi diagrams hain. Construction chapter mein se hongi, shayad.", Sid mumbled making the three heads turn towards him.

"What? Padhne ki acting karte karte kuch toh padh bhi leta hoon main.", Sid whispered. "Toh phir ab tu hi dhoondega assignment ke notes aur papers ko, jaa.", Sanju muttered and pushed Sid into the room while the other three sat of the window sill waiting for Sid to come out of the war-land of books, handouts, files, notebooks and whatever was there in the room with the assignment copies.