Dee, texting Jack: Jack! Help I'm being kidnapped
Jack: Where are you?
Dee: I'm with some strange person. In a car. Help.
Jack: I'll call Peter.
Peter, answering their cell: Y'ello?
Jack: Where's Dee? They texted me that they were being kidnapped.
Peter: Dee? Whaddya mean, they're right next to me-
Peter:
Peter: I'll call you back. *hangs up*
Peter: THE NEW HAIRCUT ISN'T THAT BAD!
Dee: WHO ARE YOU?!
🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹
Jack: HELP! I TOLD PETER I'D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN'T COOK!
Dee, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?
🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹
Dee: Don't worry, I got a plan.
Jack: Alright.
Dee: TraitorSayWhat?
Peter: Excuse me?
Dee: What?
Jack:
Dee:
Dee: No wait-
🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾
Dee: I know you snuck out last night, Jack.
Peter: Play dumb!
Jack: Who's Jack?
Peter: NOT THAT DUMB!!!
🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾
Dee: I trust Jack.
Peter: You think they know what they're doing?
Dee: I wouldn't go that far.
🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷
Dee: What time is it?
Jack: I don't know; pass me that saxophone and we'll find out
Jack: *Plays sax loudly and extremely out of tune*
Peter: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE SAXOPHONE AT TWO IN THE MORNING
Jack: It's 2 am
🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷
Dee: I told Jack their ears flush when they lie.
Peter: Why?
Dee: Look.
Dee: Hey Jack! Do you love us?
Jack, covering their ears: No.
Peter:
🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊
Dee: Jack and I were crossing the street, and this dude drove by and honked at us
Peter: *Sighing* What did Jack do?
Dee: They chased him to the next red light, then reached into his window and...
Jack: Who wants a steering wheel?
🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊🍊
Dee: Jack, keep an eye on Peter today. They're going to say something to the wrong person and get punched.
Jack: Sure, I'd love to see Peter get punched.
Dee: Try again.
Jack, sighing: I will stop Peter from getting punched.
🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀
Dee: Hey Peter,
Peter: Yes?
Dee: Can a person breathe inside a washing machine while it's on?
Peter:
Peter: Where's Jack?
🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀
YOU ARE READING
Dee's book of anything
Short StoryThis book is dead but feel free to vote or comment and shit
