A Suicidal Mission

10/9/13

So back to my stupid journal. Wait. You thought I'd start with Hi or Good Morning? What are you stupid? I only talk to my sister politely. But she's an angel, as Mum says. Last night I managed to cut a heart next to "Susie & Izzy" I have never felt so accomplished! It was real good. Last night I started to scream again. I had threw my self on the floor. The voices were telling me too. Their names are Sue, Harvey (NatashaJones12 😏) and Gordan. They were really nice to me. But they watched me write my Journal they got really mad and said I shouldn't be sharing my story. But I have to wait till it's silent in my head to write.
They won't be back for a while they have all gone to shower together so I have a few hours.

So school today was crap. These people older than me pinned me against lockers and punched me in the belly then locked me in a locker. The locker had food in. So I ate it. It was actually quite cosy. Then I think the owner opened the locker door to see me topple out. He flinched back and ran down the hall thinking I was dead. In class I had to take my jumper off revealing all my scars. The same older people laughed seeing my "Susie & Izzy" scar so I pulled out my knife and made their own scar right down their arm! It was also fun licking the blood off the knife I cut my tongue a little but I don't care. The boy said Susie never loved me and that I will never be loved. I told the same to him before stabbing the knife straight into
His leg! It was aMaZiNg!! I got sent to the Head Office they tried to take the knife of me so I screamed and hurled myself on the floor! I ran around the school screaming with my knife there was an ambulance outside I wonder who for. There was also police cars. I knew they for me so I rang the fire bell and ran out the emergency doors to get home. I got in through the back door which how into the basement. My parents weren't home which is surprising because they don't have jobs? Bit Sue, Harvey and Gordan were home! We played with a spare bowling ball. I. Accidentally threw it at the TV the TV shattered into tin pieces! I picked up the glass pieces running through my fingers! It left small cuts! But it was so good! I liked it so I filled our bath with the glass shards and found anything glass inside except the windows into the bath. I layed in it with freezing cold water! It was so painful but yet so satisfying! I wish I could describe it to you! When I got out I looked at all my scars and talked to Sue. She reminds me of Susie. Then Mum came in.. She cried and shouted at me for breakin everything and stabbing the boy at school I cried. Then they did it! They told me to throw myself on the floor again. This time I said no. Because I was naked. But Sue was so intense I did it anyway.
Gotta go.. Sue is coming back.

-Izzy

(hope you like so far!)