Human (Natasha Romanoff x reader)

Chapter 6

WARNINGS: swearing; violence; guns; bombs/explosions; horrible TV references; sad Nat (at least she didn't jump off a cliff tho)

A/N: I gotta explain the nickname real quick. In a TV show called Chuck, a spy named Colonel John Casey throws a microwave at a dude with a gun, thus rendering him unconscious, and says, "Now that's what I call moving some merchandise." In a featurette, he talks about becoming a spy and says something like "So you wanna be a deadly spy?"

We never left Natasha's room last night. She, understandably, didn't want the team to see her with puffy, red eyes and smudged mascara. When we came out in the morning, Wanda, Steve, and Clint were already in the kitchen. I made eye contact with Wanda, and her raised eyebrow and smirk told me exactly what she was thinking. I subtly shook my head with a neutral expression, telling her that's not what happened. She furrowed her eyebrows but looked away nonetheless.
Natasha sat on a stool and I poured each of us a cup of coffee; we both drank it black. I poured myself a bowl of Cheerios and Natasha grabbed an apple. It was a relaxed morning; Wanda watching a sitcom from her place at the kitchen island and Steve and Clint making small conversation. I heard a large BOOM in the distance. Steve was the only other one who heard it, with his hearing being enhanced and mine being just slightly better than average. We made eye contact and abruptly stood up to look out the large windows. We could see smoke in the distance. The others had noticed our odd behavior and Clint asked, "What is it?"
"I don't know. It seemed like an explosion." Before I had the chance to say anything else, a loud alarm started blaring over the speakers, along with a message for the Avengers to report to the main conference room immediately. Everyone stood and rushed toward the elevator. I looked at Natasha, unsure if I should go too, and she gestured with her head to follow them.
When we arrived in the conference room, the rest of the team was there, along with Nick Fury and Maria Hill. "What's going on, Fury?" Oh boy, Steve was using his 'Captain America' voice.
"Terrorists are targeting New York. There has been one bombing so far, but our intel says that they're planning two more within the hour. One at Grand Central Terminal, and the other at the Empire State Building. SHIELD agents can handle the bomb that already went off, but we need the Avengers to stop the next two. Rogers, Banner, Pietro, and Barton; you will be going to the Empire State Building. Romanoff, Eight, and Wanda; you will be going to Grand Central. Stark, you will be reporting to Grand Central, but be prepared to move if needed; you'll be able to get there faster than anyone. Be safe. Kick ass. Keep this city safe."
"Damn, he's good at that," Pietro mumbled with raised eyebrows. With that, we left the conference room to suit up and move out.

Wanda, Natasha, Tony, and I were flying on my jet to Grand Central. When we got closer, Tony hopped out and flew to the station in his suit. I landed the jet as close as possible and we got out, running toward the station. According to the intel, the terrorists were planning to blow the place up in the next twenty minutes, so there was no time to waste.
"I'll go in through the roof. Romanoff, you take the south entrance. Maximoff, you take the east entrance, and, Eight, you take the north entrance." Stark did a good job at giving orders when Cap wasn't around, I'll give him that.
We each moved to our designated entrances and breached. I went through the north wing of the building but didn't find any of the terrorists. I could hear the others clearing rooms over the comms. I heard a voice coming through a doorway, so I entered, and discovered a large man standing in an industrial kitchen. He was speaking on his cell phone in a foreign language. I holstered my gun, knowing that shooting him would alert everyone in the station. He hung up the phone and turned around, spotting me. He drew his gun, but I knocked it out of his hand and kicked his knee inward, eliciting a sickening CRACK from the joint. I heard footsteps behind me and spun around to see another one of the bombers. I exchanged a few blows with him before muttering, "This is taking too long," and jumping onto the counter. I jumped onto his shoulders and wrapped my legs around his throat, then flipped backward off of him, effectively snapping his neck and landing on my feet. The other bomber started limping toward me with a large dagger in his hand, and he looked pissed. He moved to stab me, but I sidestepped his swing and he shoved me into the counter. I grabbed the small microwave off the counter next to me and threw it at his head. He fell to the floor in a slump.
"Huh. That worked better than I expected," I mumbled to myself.
"Yeah, nice move, John Casey." Wait, when did Romanoff even get here?
"What the hell does that mean? Who's John Casey?" I didn't trust the smirk on her face.
"I'll explain later, Deadly Spy. Let's get moving."
"I'm so confused."
We made our way down the hallway toward the center of the station. We came across the main area, but there was a second floor overlooking the ground level. I did a quick analysis of the situation before making a decision. "We don't have time to clear both floors together; we need to split up. I'll go up and clear the second floor. You take the ground level." She gave me a curt nod and we both took off. I made it up the stairs and drew my gun. I could hear voices coming from a room further down the hall. I found the room they were in and read the sign; they were in the maintenance room and, oh shit....gas lines. They were going to set off the bomb and ignite the gas lines一it would take out the entire station. I flicked off my gun's safety and took a deep breath. I kicked the door in and shot three men in quick succession. I checked all of the corners to ensure that the room was clear. I found the bomb and did a quick run-down. It was really complicated. I caught sight of the timer and a horrible feeling settled in my stomach; there were only two minutes and twenty-four seconds left. I heard Romanoff, Maximoff, and Stark give their respective 'all-clear's over the comms. I hesitated before I spoke. They needed to get out of here. I probably won't be able to disarm the bomb, but I needed to try. "I'm all clear. The bomb has been disarmed. I'll meet you by the jet. Evacuate the block and steer clear of the station just to be safe." The lie tasted bitter on my tongue, but I couldn't let my teammates get themselves killed. I knelt down and immediately got to work on the bomb. I had been trained to defuse bombs, but this was a whole new level of complicated. I risked a glance at the timer一 2:03. I carefully removed the main panel and raked my eyes over the mess of wires. I followed the two separate red wires along their paths to see which one I needed to cut. I chose the one that I thought was correct. I took a deep breath and cut the wire. I didn't blow up, so that must've been the right one. I then found the three different green wires. I did the same thing with them as I had with the red, and decided on a wire. I was about to make the cut when that sultry voice came over the comms.
"You okay in there, Casey? You're taking a while to get to the jet."
Before I told her the truth, I had to make sure she would be safe. "Hey, Tony?"
"What's up, Eight?"
"I need you to make sure Natasha doesn't come back into the station, no matter how much she fights you on it, okay?"
"That's an odd request, but sure thing."
"What's going on, Eight?" I could hear the concern in her voice.
"So, um, I might've lied. The bomb is not disarmed. It's really complicated and I don't think I'm gonna be able to get it."
"What?! Why the hell did you lie?! Where are you?" Her voice was frantic now.
"I had to make sure you guys were safe. I'm trying to defuse this thing before it blows."
"Get your ass out of there now."
"You know I can't do that, Red. There are still a few civilians here." I could hear her fighting against Tony, who was probably holding her back from running into the station.
"How long before it blows?"
I looked at the timer and internally cringed. "A minute and fifteen seconds."
"Oh God, Eight. Please, please, get out of there."
"I'm really sorry, Nat." I cut the wire before I could chicken out, and at first, nothing happened. I thought I had done it, but a louder beeping filled the room and the timer changed to thirty seconds. It would take at least a minute to get out of the station.
"What's going on, Eight? Why did you get quiet?"
"The bomb had a fail-safe. The timer dropped to thirty seconds. There's no time for me to get out of here."
"No. No. You can make it, please. Please, you have to get out."
"There's no time, Red. I'm going to die here. We don't have a lot of time and there's a lot I want to say. You've been my best friend for years. I've been enchanted by you from the moment I caught sight of you standing in the street during that invasion. It took me a while to figure it out, but I am so utterly, undeniably in love with you. You showed me that I'm not a weapon, that I'm not anybody's puppet. You made me feel like a person instead of a lab rat. You made me feel human. I love you so much, Natasha Romanoff. I wish we could've had a lifetime together, but I guess we'll have to settle for this."
"I love you too, Eight. I've been in love with you for so long. Please don't leave me. Don't leave me." I could barely understand her words through her sobs.
"I don't want to, Red, but I don't have much of a choice. Life works in funny ways. We might not have gotten a happy ending with a big house in the country and a couple of kids running around, but that doesn't make our story a bad one. We truly were a beautiful tragedy, Miss Romanoff." Seven seconds. "I love you, Natasha." Six seconds. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner." Four seconds. "We would've been beautiful." Two seconds.
"I love you, Eight." I had made my way over to the window during my goodbye speech; I didn't want to watch this. I looked down to the ground and 一wait a damn minute. There's a window. There's a fucking window. I quickly shot out the glass, but I was too late. A loud BOOM and an unbearable heat flooding my back was the last thing I registered before it went black.

Tony's POV:
I heard Eight's heartfelt goodbye over the comms and tears instantly sprung to my eyes. I wasn't that close to the woman, but I could see how defeated Natasha was. She was pulling against my arms trying to get free and run into the station, but it was no use with my metal suit. Natasha, the woman who never shows an ounce of emotion, was sobbing in my arms. She strangled out one last 'I love you' before a giant explosion ate through the building and tore upward through the ceiling. Maximoff collapsed to her knees as her hand muffled the sobs fighting to break free from her mouth. Even if she hadn't muffled her cries, they would've seemed silent in comparison to the soul-shattering wails falling from the devastated woman in my arms. I heard another explosion in the distance and saw smoke rising from the tall building on the horizon. My heart dropped even further into my stomach. We had failed. I had failed. Silent tears ran down my face as I escorted the broken woman and the distressed witch onto the jet.

Natasha's POV:
I didn't know what to do. She's gone. The weight of her absence suffocated my heart and stole the oxygen from my lungs.
Breathe in. Breathe out. I had to repeat it in my mind so I didn't forget how.
I couldn't stop thinking about the 'what ifs'. What if I had told her how I felt sooner? What if I had just kissed her? What if I hadn't wasted so much time? The ruthless assassins who were too scared to admit that they were in love. I hated her for leaving me. I hated her for becoming my everything just to take it all away. I hated her for making me love her. More than anything, I hated myself. I should've known something was wrong. I should've gone to her. I should've saved her.
I don't know how long I was sitting there on the jet. It could've been five minutes. It could've been five hours. Not that it mattered, really. Not anymore.
"Come on, Nat. We've been back at the tower for almost twenty minutes and you haven't moved." I tore my absent gaze away from the metal wall of the jet to meet Wanda's glossy eyes. They'd barely known each other for two days, but I could tell they had gotten closer. It hurt my head to think about it. It hurt my heart to think about her. About the memories. About what could've been. I let out a shaky breath and stood up without saying anything. I didn't trust my voice. We walked side by side into the tower.
"I'm going to go shower." My voice was quiet, but she nodded, so she must've heard me.

I got out of the shower and threw on the old Aerosmith t-shirt that Eight had left in a drawer in my room. I sat on my bed and grabbed the picture of us from the nightstand.
(Flashback) "Come on, just one picture!"
"No. Put the damn camera away, Eight."
"But your hair matches the sunset. It's the perfect opportunity for a picture!"
"We're stuck in traffic on the freeway, how would that make a good picture?"
"Because it has you in it. And, more importantly, it has me in it." (End flashback)
Tears dripped onto the glass of the frame. How can such a lighthearted memory become so sorrowful? My thoughts were interrupted by the loud shrill of my phone. I grabbed it and checked the screen; I didn't recognize the number. I answered anyway一very few people had this number. "Hello?"
"Is this Natalie Rushman?" Okay...what the hell? I haven't used that alias since the assignment on Stark.
"Uh...yes, this is she. Who is this?"
"My name is Colleen Tylers. I'm a nurse at New York Municipal Hospital. I'm calling to speak to you about a patient of ours."