The Neverland Project ✎

━━ eight

We drove to the mall. 

It was a peaceful drive since the morning work rush had already filtered out of the highway, so there were barely any cars on the road. Curtis and I sat in silence, only speaking to point out the occasional bird or animal that we spotted on the side of the road. I kept both of my hands wrapped tightly around the wheel, gripping it until my knuckles turned white. Even then, I didn't loosen my grip. Curtis was drumming his fingers on the dashboard, tapping in time with the random pop song coming through the speakers. I bobbed my head to the music, despite not really hearing the lyrics. I just wanted to appear normal. For it to look like I was fine, despite having broken down in front of Curtis a couple of minutes ago. 

You're fine. 

I repeated the words over and over in my head as I drove. Maybe if I heard them enough times, it would be true and my mind wouldn't feel like it was in shambles. Curtis kept glancing over at me, but I kept my eyes directly in front of me, squinting at the road. There were snowbanks lining each side of the road, and the sunlight reflected off of them, causing the entire landscape to glow in a dazzling white. It made it a little hard to drive, though.

When we pulled off onto the exit that led to the only mall in Brockton the landscape began to change. The rolling hills and low-lying shrubbery that decorated the sides of the highway faded away and were replaced by signs advertising breakfast sandwiches and deals on winter jackets. 

As I turned into the mall parking lot I was taken aback by just how many people were there despite the mall only just opening ten minutes ago. The parking lot was almost entirely full. Where all the people had come from, I had no idea. I'd always assumed that the mall would be nearly empty during the work-day, but it was almost impossible to find a parking space. 

A couple of people honked their horns at me as I maneuvered through the maze of cars. "Some people are shit at parking," I mumbled, which caused Curtis to chuckle in the seat next to me as I slumped back into the seat in frustration as a truck cut in front of me. 

Finally, I pulled into a parking spot at the back of the lot. It would take us a minute to actually get to the building, but at least we'd found a spot to park, no matter how far away. From where we sat in the car I could see more vehicles pulling into the parking lot and more people filing into the building, purses in hand. 

I'd never really been a mall person, never quite having enough pocket money to afford clothes from all the nicer shops inside and being limited to the drugstore and Old Navy. But now, as a sixteen-year-old with her own part-time job, I had a bit more spending money to use on new clothes and overpriced mall coffee. I twisted around in the front seat to reach into the back, unzipping the front compartment of my backpack to grab my wallet. I zipped the pocket back up once I'd retrieved what I was looking for and then unlocked the car.

Curtis was looking at me with the most curious expression on his face. "Cherry, what are we doing here?" He asked, staring at me from the passenger seat. His fingers were still now, hidden in his pockets as he looked at me. 

I shook the question off, opening the car door and hauling myself out. Curtis muttered something I couldn't quite hear before climbing out of the car after me. Outside, I fumbled for a moment finding my car keys in my sweater pocket before pulling out the little keyring and pressing the button to lock the doors.

"Cherry!" Curtis called my name again, coming around the car so that he could stand directly in front of me, "What are you doing?" I turned around to face him. He was standing there with his hands stuffed in his pockets.

"I just need to do something- anything different," I said determinedly. I'd tried to sound brave, but my voice wobbled and raised a few octaves. Turning red, I started trudging through the parking lot slush and towards the mall. The wet snow soaked through the canvas of my shoes, and I could feel my socks getting wetter. I could hear someone running to catch up with me. A turn of my head confirmed that it was Curtis. He was jogging through the muck to walk alongside me, and it only took him a few long strides to have caught up.