why is everything so hard

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Ash came running to me she quickly closed the doors and i cried in her shoulder i cried so loudly

Me: ash it  h h hurts it h h hurts so bad aww

Ash: i understand can you try to move it's a very big cut

Me: I'll try one more time

Ash:good that it is in the side of your stomach if it has been in the middle you have died in 30 seconds
Here let me help you take my support

I tried to move and thank fully i was able to moved a little bit because of ash support

after sometime i came out of the car and went to the house she took me to a room where it was like a little hospital

i laid on the bed and i fainted when i woke up i felt a pain in my body i slowly opened my eyes and

i felt dizzy....my head was spinning my eyes were blurred and i heard the door close

  but i couldn't even process what was happening after like 20 minutes my vision was clear

my memories came back and the pain too  i tried to move and sit and it wasn't hard but it wasn't easy too

i sawed that i was in my room. I rubbed my eyes twice and process everything that happened

Me:mom dad
I wispered
Me:can I come to your place
I wispered loudly

Me:there will be you gramma grandpa felix everyone that i love
a tear fell down

Me:plz take me with you I think i will go insane in this world

I then cried in my pillow i cried for like 5 hours like no one was watching me 

i also smashed things on my table and ripped some pillows off in anger,

despair,sadness, loneliness depression ,imotional breakdown and pain

after sometime ash came with my lunch

Ash:do you feel good now
Me: worse and better

Ash:good to hear you have been in bed unconscious for 1 day i heard some noises i checked on u smashing things and crying, here you must be hungry

Me: i won-
Tae:you will eat
Ash:you hear him take this it's good for your health

Me:i i won't eat
Tae:why are you disobeying me do u want me to beat you up

Me: yes i won't eat i won't obey why do you you want to kill me i will happily die it doesn't look like someone cares-

I was about to say more but suddenly ash putted
a hand on my mouth and shush me down i gave her a glare

Ash: no no don't come she will eat and she will obey

She force fully made me eat no matter how much i said no

then she wiped the food from my lips while i kept glaring at her and then she left

Tae: good girl

I didn't said nothing and just looked down when ever they tried to piss me off or talk to me

i just ignored them till the night came i got ready to go to bed when jk screamed

Jk:yah why are you ignoring us

I wanted to scream but i said nothing

Jk: stop fucking ignoring us we
asked you questions and you didn't even answer

who is he my dad i hate you i wasn't answering you because you make me mad and go insane

i hate you soo much i wish you all could just disappear from my life

i can't believe i ever felt bad for u scumbag*internal screaming*

Jk: you are not going to answer hah wait i am coming to your room

Jimin: i will go too
Tae: she is such a brat

They all came charging to my room and looked at me like they will beat me up any second

i got scared quickly and looked at them oh i shouldn't have given them that attitude they all look so scary

Tae:so you were ignoring us huh
.....................................................................
Jimin: don't you got a tongue speak

Jk: you really forcing me to beat u up huh

He then slapped me soo hard i felt like i have broken a teeth

Me: yah what do you want
Jimin:brat huh
He gave me another slap

Tae: now answer our questions
When you opened your eyes did Ted do something to you

Me:he kissed me
Tae:did he do anything sexual
Me:why do you care

Tae: you want another slap seriously answer the questions
Did he do something

Me: n no
Tae:are you telling the truth

Me:yes
Tae:are you fucking sure
Me:yes
Tae:swear on our parents

Me:oh my god i said yes
Tae: swear

Me: i swear on my parents he did nothing exept kissing me one time

I spoke annoyedly and jk jimin and tae looked at eachother with relief

Tae: uh so second one jimin you say
Jimin: how many boyfriends do you have

Me: i don't have a boyfriend
Jimin:ex's
Me: maybe a few
Jimin: how many
Me:3

Everyone looked at each other
Jimin:wtf
Tae:no way

Jk:who do you think you are
Jimin: 3 of them

Me: why i guess it's normal

Jimin: how can this be few huh i only have like 17 exes and you have 3! In this age

Me:17 is a large number

Jimin:ok okay now what are their names huh
Me: umm felix, Liam, Alex

Jimin:oh ok third question jk

Jk:uhh ok why do you always give me the worst one huh
Tae:you are the maknae that's why

Jimin: just hurry up this one is exiting
Jk: what is your body count
Me: w what

Jk: do you know what is s*x
Me:huh!
Jk: have you done it if you have how many times

My face went totally red oh my god who ask their sister this of course brothers who doesn't have a brain

Jk: tell this is serious
Me:do you have a brain what the hell is wrong with you
Jk: tell it's urgent

Me: do you think i was going to tell you creeps huh GET OUT OF MY ROOM NOW!

I was madly red and scary i yelled at the top of my lungs  and they quickly got out of my room

this was to personal what like i didn't even got words to describe how i felt

let's just say uhh mixed emotions

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