Midnight Phantasm

ENCHANTED

I love writing. It's always something that I'd like to do when everything and everyone is overwhelming me. I tend to finish one story, or maybe a poem, or perhaps just a terrible workplace rant in one sitting, and then the peace of mind comes rushing in... just like how it has always been. 

Looking at my drafts, I have several short stories that I already started painting my words into. One's titled The Man, something about a girl who finally found her man after dating a bunch of guys. And there's Maps and Timelines, also The Ideal Type and my favorite, A Date. But you see, I have perfect plots, I've got the vocabulary ready to puzzle into one piece, and I'm even freaking inspired! And I haven't finished one single thing.

Maybe because I'm writing these chapters trying all the means to preserve our story...

Maybe because somehow, deep down in my heart, I don't want us to end...

Or it's just simply because reality is finally better than my imagination.

I want to write about how we started, but I guess, words are not enough to describe it. We were unexpected, that I'm sure of. It's like one of those cliché dramas saying "you're too busy searching for the one that you don't even realize that he's right in front of you all this time." You would tell me that you still can't believe that it's me, and I'll tell you the same thing, because really... how in the world? One day we're just friends who liked talking and hanging out together, and the next day we are two people who were just more than that. 

You do realize you're extraordinary, right? No one has ever taken me out on a date like you did. I remember so clearly, you asking me one Monday afternoon if I'm free Thursday night that week and I said yes, thinking that that was your way of asking me out.  But boy you sent butterflies on my stomach when you called me at 8:30pm that night, formally asking if you can take me out on a date. I said an assuring "yes" of course, then you told me to be ready because you'll pick me up at my apartment after 30 minutes. Which you really did.

Like a true gentleman on a first date, you opened the door of your car for me, turned the heater up when I told you I was too cold and you even asked me if I wanted something specific to eat or do. I didn't even have to reply because you told me right there and then that you booked us to a nice place. Although we might have to wait for a little while to sit down on that restaurant, we did not waste a single second because you drove me around the city's best views instead. God, I still feel shivers whenever I recall that moment. You've got everything planned out and I loved it. I always replay it on my mind over and over again so that I would never forget the feeling. And from there, we ate dinner, talked, grabbed hot coffee on the drive thru, then talked again... and that's when we first kissed, the most romantic one I had ever since.

Eventually, you became someone I can rely on all aspects of my life. However, it was not something I decided on by myself. You came to me willingly and openly, telling me that I don't have to carry it all alone, that you're there for me. You have the purest intentions for me, I have to say. It is all clear and never did once you gave me a doubt. I felt your sincerity deep down to my core that I let down my guard with no reservations. You're honest and you take all your words seriously. With you, I don't have the chance to give a second thought because I am always sure.

I love being vulnerable around you. And I love it when you are, too. You don't know how fascinating it is to listen to your stories about your life and the struggles you had. We may have different beliefs and culture but we managed to keep an open mind and embrace our differences. I love the midnight car dates, too! You letting me roll your car windows down and allowing me to choose the song we would sing our lungs out are my favorite things to do every time. We'd share chismis in between and we'd asked each other questions that would lead us into deep thinking. Sometimes we'd bicker, too: me pointing out your sudden shift of direction when driving and you scolding me whenever I get too stubborn. But I loved every single bit of it wallahe.

It's just sad to realize that I had to leave too soon, that's why I questioned my decisions in life. I thought if really leaving to another country will be the best thing for my future— when in fact that the best thing is already with me. But that's what you really are: the best thing for me, because you never let me give up on my dreams. I was planning to stay in my comfort zone, as well as, staying because of you but you were the one who made sure that I have to take the path that I was eyeing for a while now. You supported me in all ways possible even if I was telling you that I don't want to do it anymore. How could I let go of someone that I want to keep in my life forever?

As I have said, you take your words seriously. Recalling the things you told me on our first date, you said that you don't want me to remember you as the guy who lead me on only to break my heart. You also told me that you'd like to keep us in touch, while making sure that we both are living our own lives. And you did. You never broke my heart all this time and you gave me the space I needed for myself to grow. Sure, it was painful leaving you, and the thought that you're in pain because you're thinking that you lost me... it's killing me. But damn, you made me so happy. I was in my happiest when I was with you. I am still happy until now, even after we broke up because you made everything easy for me and I appreciate you for that.

I don't want to call this a love story, because usually, love stories end up in a tragedy. We're not going to end in a tragedy, for our story is never-ending anyway.

It was enchanting to meet you, babe. And as the song goes, my thoughts will echo your name until I see you again.