A Recipe for Diaster (Harry Potter Fanfic)

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A/n: This chapter contains some scenes from the series Everybody Loves Raymond season 2 Episode 15 "Marie's Meatballs". I hope you enjoy.

Scabior was sleeping peacefully until his door slammed opened and the lights came blazing on him. He grumbled while holding his hands over his face, waiting for his eyes to adjust to it. Once they did, the first thing he saw was a pissed off Hermione, who was leaning over him. If looks could kill, Hermione's look would have been an atomic bomb dropped on him. 

"Everything okay? What's wrong?" He asked her. While keeping her heated glare, Hermione held up something Scabior couldn't make out. 

"This. What is this?" Hermione asked, flinging at him. Scabior fumbled to catch the bottle. Pushing himself into a sitting position, Scabior glance down at what he was holding. His eyes widened when he realized what it was. 

"It's... it's a jar of tarragon. Why?" He asked.

"Oh don't even, I know all about it. Ron knows too." Hermione shot at him. Shit, he thought, moving till his legs were leaning over the bed. 

"How did you find out?" 

"Your fake label came off." 

"Damn muggle glue stick," Scabior grumbled, placing the bottle onto the nightstand. 

"What the bloody hell were you thinking, Scabior? Why did you do this? You drove Ron insane with this whole damn recipe!" Hermione asked him, furiously. 

"I didn't mean to make him crazy! I just didn't want to make you think of me as an ass by telling you 'no, I don't want to share my recipes with him'." Scabior explained. Hermione crossed her arms. 

"Scabior, I would have figure since it was your family's recipe that you would have wanted to keep it in the family if you went down that route. You made a bigger ass of yourself doing this shit!" Hermione shouted at him, "Worse, I tried to defend you to Ron since I'm your girlfriend and I don't want to be a bad girlfriend. But you made me look stupid and a bad friend when I find out you pulled this stunt on Ron!" 

"I didn't mean to do it. I just wanted him to make the recipe fail and then he would back the hell off!" Scabior blurted out. 

"Back the hell off? What are you talking about?" Hermione asked, confused with what he was saying. 

"Haven't you been noticing Ron's been more flirty and trying to get closer to you?" Scabior pointed out, "It's been pissing me off since I've been wanting to shout at him, 'Hey! That's my girl! Get the bloody hell away from her!' but can't since we've been on this whole keep our relationship a secret." 

For a moment neither one spoke till Hermione spoke up. 

"Why didn't you tell me this was bothering you, Scabior?" 

"Because you seemed to be enjoying it, and I didn't want to ruin what we have." Scabior admitted. Hermione sighed. 

"You should have said something instead of doing this stupid stunt. We could have figure out when to tell the others about us instead of Ron going insane trying to prove you did something to his spaghetti." Hermione told him, "Tomorrow at dinner time, we'll tell them. That way you you have time to make it right to Ron." 

Scabior laughed. 

"Okay, I'll do something to earn his forgiveness." Scabior promised before he reached out towards Hermione. She surprisingly slapped his hand. 

"What do you think you're doing?" She asked him. 

"Can we cuddle for a bit? I'm a bit cold." Scabior said, smirking a bit. Hermione's lips suddenly curled up into a smirk. 

"Oh I don't think so. As punishment for this stunt, you're not sleeping with me for three months." Hermione told him. His eyes widened. 

"What!?!?" Scabior shouted. 

"Sorry, you should have thought of this before pulling this stunt." Hermione shot at him then proceeded out of the room before turning back and mockingly saying, "I may lower if for good behavior." 

"Oh you are a tease," Scabior growled, licking his lips, as he watched her leave his room.