Tears of a Teenage Girl

How could he!?

Dear Brianne,

I am writing to say sorry. Sorry for everything. Sorry for the day of the parade, how I left you there on your own. It was stupid of me and I can't forgive myself. I love you Brianne. Forever and always.

Dylan xoxo

Yeah right, fat fucking prick. I tear the stupid piece of paper into pieces and toss it into the bin by Ms Clarkson's classroom. The words themselves may seem quite.. emotional...but they're really not. Not when you count in the  additional factors making up this 'cute' little message. Perhaps the first one being the fact it was written on a ripped out paper from his maths book - he got an algebra question wrong on the other side and the squares were a bit of a telltale sign to begin with... but there is also more to this story. As in more detail to do with the "parade" incident. 

First of all, it wasn't really a parade, just the county fair. Dylan called it that because of his current emo phase. (He's somewhat obsessed with mcr, you can add those two together). Anyways, he invited me to go, eyeliner and all. I was so stupidly happy. All I could think was that my perfect werfect boy boyfriend is taking me on a cutesy wupsey date yipeeeeee.. This was to be our second date - the first one being at the maccies in town a week ago, the same day he asked to go out with me. I said yes, because I did quite like him... he is quite the looker and I like the edge - he ruins it with that gob of his but it's whatever. Back to that cursed day...I met him there right by the field and at first everything was going fine, that was until we bumped into his mates. Smelly Sam, Irritating Igor, Jergy Jerry and the pick me-ist girl you could ever meet in the the entire universe and beyond - loogy lucy. I know my way of introducing them are quite horrid henry -ish and 'jergy' and 'loogy' probably aren't words but I think they do the job in helping you to understand these people. Their little squad always irked me, the truth is, Dylan is alright on his own, but with this people he just completely transforms, it's actually incredible. Togteher they're all loud obnoxious gross knobs. As soon as they saw me I became invisible. 

I stood awkwardly as they acted like chimps, "OI OI OI SHWGWIHSBBH" is most of what I heard. Not once did Dylan himself mention my presence. My Dylan, how could he... I knew all along he never liked me as much as I liked him... but to be fair, I am more interested in the version of him I built in my brain. The one who smiles when he sees me and has good music taste. Not the one who naruto runs through the chicken coop before being asked to leave the premises, which did happen may I add. This all happened in the span of half an hour. When Dylan got kicked out the others left with him. I wanted to see if Dylan, or any of them would remember the fact that I was also initially part of this little parade team. No one. No one came back for me. Then it started to rain. I know, quite cliche, but it was an October day in England. Rain soaked through my hoodie and into my shirt, it fell on my face but it was already wet, from tears. I know I shouldn't cry over utter arsehles but I just felt so fucking defeated. I didn't bring a coat ... because a part of me wished that Dylan (or at least Dylan 2.0 from my mind) would follow the "here, here's my coat because I'm a sexy gentleman" trope. Well, that didn't happen, Nothing that I imagined or semi-hoped for had happened. Not him giving me a cute plushie price he won cause he's so good at hitting a target. Or the "here, let me get that" as silly goofy me gets ice cream on my nose and he rubs it off. Like... how hard is it. Ugh, men. I got home and went straight to the shower. The warm water felt so good against my freezing body. On the walk home I was sort of hoping I'd get hypothermia and die, I just didn't feel like anything would ever be good again.

The shower made me realise I was being dramatic. I put my big girl shoes on and left a... let's just say a 'little' message, informing Dylan of why I felt a bit... sad when he and his friends ignored me.