Tw: Mentions of Suicide, Cursing, Vaping, Smokeing, Captivity, Eatting Disorder
[Day 1 Of not protecting the Prison]
I woke up finally, I thought I slept to long, Though some would disagree.. 8 hours of sleep, I can't believe I did that! I'm such a fucking idiot, I slept to long, What if someone could have broken out? What if someone would get hurt? I can't fix someone, I can barely hold myself together- No I can do this be calm and collected. This will be fine, You can have the old Warden punish you for your mistake.
"You'll live Boy, Get up."
I got this, I need to find him. I wondered through what felt like the whole head space worth of rooms and people, A beautiful meadow, So calming and pretty, It would be such a good place to listen to music and wind down-
"Weakness. Shows the inmates you can be pushed around. You want that Boy? To be pushed around."
No, I don't- 'Do I?' No. I'm- I'm the new Warden. No one can push me around, I can face them. 'I'm just waiting to collapse' I can take it.
"GET UP"
I scream, My lungs beg me to stop but- I can't, 'It wasn't real' I stop. My throat hurts from the pain I just put it through, 'If only the Warden provided water..' Toughen up. I have a prison to run. I walk around the obsidian walls..
'Home'
That's what this is, It's no prison, It's my home. I'm forbidden to go out of the Prison, "The inmates might get out" So- I'm stuck there- No, Not stuck, I chose this. 'Right?..' Yes, Yes I did. I wanted to fix this place up. Be better then the old Warden.
"What the hell are you doing Boy! Get up!"
I stop standing around, I start walking to ever cell, Checking everyone, Taking away weapons or potential ways of Commiting.
'The usual'
I walk back to the guards room, I grab my Pod. 'Smoking' Something I turned too to keep my head straight as I live here. Just to keep me going.
'Barely'
I stare at the salmon colored device in my hand, 'Bottoms up'
'It burns'
I feel my self breathe in through my mouth, I swiftly close it to keep my "Happiness" in.
[I Inhaled]
My throat burns as the white cloud makes it's way to my lungs, 'It was to big of a hit' I stumble as my body quickly feels the effect of it spreading. I hold onto the wall as I try to fix my eyesight.
"Idiot"
I go to Front, Something the old Warden told me not to do, They said it was easy to take even the most cruel person and make them weak.
I take my first steps
I find someone, I call out, To any Malicitor I can find, I beg, I cry, I wail.
"Pathetic"
I just want to be loved, Something a Warden like myself dosen't deserve or need.
"Weak"
I talk to someone, I'm buzzed, To buzzed to really understand my speech, But- I'm yelling why am I yelling
'I'm crying'
.
I start to cry as I yell at anyone near by, "MALICITORS I NEED YOU" "FUCKING PUSSIES" I-
.
"Your weak"
.
I know Sir, I need to be fixed.
.
'Take me to my punishment Sir'
.
.
I am weak
