L.O.V.E

Chapter 12~ Insecurities

Ivy POV

We've been on this plane for at least 1 day and a couple hours. I hate flights and I keep staring at myself in the bathroom mirror. God had to give me stuff that I'm insecure about and I hate it.

I keep tracing the marks that are on my side and across my stomach and down my thigh.

"Ivy....oh shit." I know what that 'oh shit' means. It means I'm not supposed to be looking at my self thinking the worse.

I feel my eyes burn with tears and all Aaliyah does is sit behind me on the toilet.

"Ivy amore stop it and come here." I shake my head and continue to look at myself.

Aaliyah knows when to comfort and when not too. Which is a good thing.

"Ivy....come here." She stood up and came behind me so now both of our frames are in the mirror.

Her arm snaked around my stomach and she pulls me into her front side.

I watched as she examined my body with her eyes and hands. She rubbed each scar or mark there was. I then felt her lips touch my neck. She pulled away after a few minutes and looked at me with both of our frames in the mirror.

"Stop doing this to yourself Ivy. Your too pretty to be crying over stuff that people have done towards you." She is right.

"And also you gotta stop doing half of this to yourself Ivy. Your too precious and beautiful to be doing that." She twirled me so that now I'm facing her instead of the mirror.

"I love you Ivy and I'm going to make sure you know it because I'm the only one who's going to be seeing any naked part of your body." I looked up at her as she lifted my chin.

I felt tears go down my cheek and my breath felt really heavy.

"Close your eyes and breathe Ivy." I did as she said and kept myself as calm as I could. I felts her hand rub up and down my back. I felt calm near her. I laid my head on her chest and let out a quiet sob.

"It's okay I'm here."

"I feel like shit Aaliyah." I lifted my head and left out the bathroom with Aaliyah hand in mines.

"I just want to sleep." She nodded and I laid my head on her chest and the next thing I know I'm sleep.

Back home

"Ugh back to school and medical shit." I chuckled at Aaliyah while she carried me on her back to the dorms.

"You do know I could have walked right?" I rested my chin on her shoulder.

"Yea but I wanted to carry you so I'm carrying you now hush it."

"Jeez no need to be a grumpy."

"Shut it short person." I let out a groan

"And she's baaack."

"Look don't blame me blame the atmosphere, it's filled with horny no good drug sex using kids who aren't mature for college but yet come here to piss in everyone's coffee."  Yup Ivy you had nice Aaliyah for two whole weeks now she's back.

"Okay we are at our dorm can you please put me down."

"Once we get in, yes." I let out a sigh and just waited.

"Okay now you can get down."

"Oh why thank you your highness." She rolled her eyes and brung our bags in.

After she made me help bring the bags in I walked over to my side and began to unpack my bag.

I felt Aaliyah arms wrap around my waist and turn me to face her.

"Ivy I'm gonna ask you this once and please be honest with me." I tilt my head. "Are you okay?" I let out a sigh and watched her eyes search my eyes for an answer.

"Aaliyah not right now." I tried to walk away but her grip around my waist got tighter as she stared in my eyes.

"Yes Ivy right now because it is now 6am in the next hour we have classes and i don't need you spazzing out on someone because one that's not you two i know something is wrong i want to talk but i can't if you don't talk to me, Ivy fucking hell i love you and with loving someone is also being there for them and that is what i want to do for the woman i love so Ivy please talk to me." God these tears are not friendly.

"I'm tired Aaliyah of feeling like this. Like....like I did something wrong or like I'm not comfortable in my own skin. Yes i have flaws but these flaws are painful and they hurt me to the point were i can't breath by myself or that i can't walk and i want to stay by myself under my covers in my bed away from the world because it hurts Aaliyah i hurt and i know people see me and say she's too happy and excited and hyper and i have too because it's either that or become so depressed that i move back with my dad and brother and trust me i don't want to that because living with my dad will make me suicidal and i don't like that feeling so no Aaliyah I'm not okay I'm in pain that I have been trying to get rid of but it comes back and hurts ten times it did from before." She just looked at me with this blank expression but her eyes say everything.

"You can miss one more day and I'll go and get the work for us and I'll just take extra notes for us, I'll come back and bring the work and then I'll go get you some stuff." She is sweet and kind and i love her.

"Okay oh and can i have that?" I pointed at the hoodie that she had on.

"Are you serious......here." She handed me the hoodie.

Love is a thing that i don't want to leave between us.