Captain America: Love in a Time of Loss

Testing (NSFW)

Steve had always been a light sleeper- especially after coming out of the ice. He always joked that it was because he'd slept long enough. But even if he wasn't a slight sleeper, the scream that erupted from his bedroom would have torn him from sleep. He shot up from the couch and moved to the bedroom without hesitation and found Kyle sitting straight up in bed, a loom of exhausted fear on his face.

"Kyle," he said in a soothing but firm voice. He switched on the lamp and sat down on the bed.

Kyle pulled his knees up to his chest and his his face in them. "I'm sorry," he whispered after taking several breaths.

"Don't be." Steve hesitantly laid a hand on Kyle's back, slowly rubbing up and down. "You're safe."

"How did I end up in your bed? I should be in my dorm..."

"You fell asleep," Steve gently interrupted. "I didn't have the heart to wake you."

"Oh," Kyle said.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"It's always the same nightmare," Kyle murmured. "Everyone around me disappears until I'm all alone. And then I disappear too."

"I'm sorry," Steve said after a few seconds of silence.

Kyle looked up at Steve, taking in his look of contrition with confusion in his eyes. "What do you mean?"

Steve smiled bitterly and stopped rubbing Kyle's back. He pulled back and shook his head. "I failed you. You and your loved ones should have been able to trust that the Avengers could protect you."

Kyle looked at Steve's hands as he clasped them in his lap. He wanted them back on him even if he knew Steve was only touching him as a friend. "It wasn't your fault. Thanos was the monster. It's just sometimes the bad guys win."

"Sometimes I think I'm in hell," Steve confessed.

"What do you mean?" Kyle asked.

"I mean what if we all died when Thanos snapped his fingers? What if we're all dust right now and we're just...suffering? Being punished?"

"Why would you be punished?" Kyle asked as he scooted a little closer. "You're...you're Captain America," Kyle said as if that statement said it all. "You represent...the best of what a person can be."

Steve shrugged and looked up at Kyle. "Doesn't matter what I represent anymore."

"It doesn't matter?" Kyle asked. He surprised himself and reached for Steve's arm, laying a hand on it. "Are you kidding me? Of course it matters. Especially now."

"You think so?" Steve asked as he briefly looked down at Kyle's hand.

Kyle followed Steve's gaze and felt his nerve retreating. He started to pull back but Steve reached up and closed over his hand, keeping it in place.

"What do you mean?" Steve asked, his voice low.

"I mean..." Kyle paused and gathered his composure. "I mean people need hope these days. And you were right when you said people need each other."

Steve looked back at Kyle's hand trapped beneath his. Without hesitating, he slowly moved his fingers up Kyle's wrist, along his arm and up his neck until he was cupping Kyle's face. "What do you need?"

So many things, Kyle thought. He stopped breathing and felt himself drowning in Steve's sight. The hand on his face felt warm, comforting. This isn't real. There's no way it's real. I'm dreaming still. He's going to turn to dust any second.

Steve read the fear in Kyle's face and wanted to alleviate it. "What do you need, Kyle? Just tell me and I'll give it to you." He gently rubbed a circle on Kyle's cheek with his thumb, seeking to leave no room for any doubt where his intentions were concerned.