???

All i could here was the water running, i heard it splashing on the Floor, with a consistant stream i heard it flow and eventhough i knew there were People in the backgroung Screaming and crying, i just stood there Looking at the red stained shower with the water continuing to run.

Thursday 12.12.20??

it was dark, glomy the mood was down it was sad the atmosphere was horrible, it felt sufficating. Everywhere i looked there was black, Tears, and at the front a blurry Picture with some Flowers. I felt

Nothing.. it was odd it wasn't normal i felt like i was supposed to be sad, but i felt Nothing, Nothing but emptiness, so i didn't fit in, i wanted to leave but something kept me there in that oppresing space.

Saturday 14.12.20??

"hey are you list" there was someone talking, someone i knew?? no, it was a stranger, i was in a diffrent room, an entierly diffrent Building. I looked around, but i didn't see the wall Colors, all i saw where showertiles, stained in something red, it didn't fit in, it wasn't reality, i knew that but i stayed..

"i think we are done for today" the Person said before leaving, done with what?? i was confused, but i couldn't ask i felt... sad no that was a lie i didn't know why i should be sad i just sat there...

Monday 16.12.20??

"Good morning Kla.." another Person?? the same one? no the atmosphere and surroundings felt diffrent, the voice was demanding, not kalm. "As you know..." they are still talking? why why was this Person talking so much i didn't understand one word, i didn't even know if this was reality was i dreaming was i asleep or was i really here?

Monday 30.12.20??

i heard my phone ringing, i didn't recognize the number i took the call and.. i dind't get what they said it was something like "Are you Holding up ok?" or "There is no reason to feel bad it wasn't your fault" what wasn't my fault?? did i do something wrong? i just hung up without even saying a word i felt Tears rolling down my face i didn't know why i was crying i didn't have any idea, but for some reason i felt the Need to redeem myself or rather join someone...

Tuesday 31.12.20??-Wednesday 1.1.20??

i looked my doors, i looked at my Clock, it was 11.30pm i took out a pen and paper and started writing, what? i don't remember. as i put it down it was already 11.56. i stood up and stepped on a Chair, i rapped the rope around my neck and before i pushed away the Chair i remembered something, their Name was Chris no his Name was Chris he was my frined. I pushed away the Chair. the last Thing i heard was a firework going off and someone knocking on my door while Screaming and sobbing. I finally felt something while i hung ther, i felt happy, i felt like this was what i deserved, for not saving my friend, sorry Chris, guess we both broke our promise, i muttered with my last breath before the door came falling down and i blacked out and never woke up .