By Your Side (ioriku)

12

Iori and Riku spoke to each other as if they were going to be pulled apart again. Not leaving a singular detail out of all the events that went on in their daily lives without each other.

"See! It looks just like you!" Riku says, pulling a tiny keychain of a bunny out of his pocket. Its blackened eyes and petite face makes Riku laugh.

Iori lowers his glance, only mildly offended. "I don't see it."

Riku laughs again, staring at the bunny with serious intent as if it were Iori. Iori stares at Riku, quietly wishing he were the bunny.

Their conversations were light-hearted for a while, until Iori finally spoke about the thoughts that had been bothering him from the start.

"Hey, why did you think I hated you?" Iori asks, certain that he already knows the answer.

"Huh? Oh, Tenn-nii told me that you did," Riku says, innocence swirling in his eyes. There was no doubt in his mind that Tenn had told him the truth, even though he now realized it was the opposite.

"He told me that you didn't like me," Iori says, unsure as to whether he should feel relieved or furious that his assumption was correct. He feels a combination of both. A feeling he can't describe. But, it all combines to form a singular emotion, one that's been eating away at him for the past two weeks: Confusion.

Riku, on the other hand, was not as confused as he'd been lonely these past weeks. Lonely to the point of self-pity. He wouldn't admit it. Of course not. He wouldn't admit that he'd been secretly wishing that Iori would come back to him. He wouldn't admit to Iori that perhaps his emotions were a little too strong for a mere friendship. He would definitely never admit to him that if Iori had come even a day late, maybe it would have been too late.

And now, although he isn't quite alone, he still feels lonely. His loneliness is replaced with guilt now. A guilt caused by his brother, who made him feel a different emotion entirely.

"I'm sorry," Riku says, looking down at the ground. His fists are balled and shaking, and he almost wishes Iori would reach out and take them. He can't look Iori in the eye.

"What for?"

"For my brother," he says, it comes out breathy, as if his chest tightened at the thought of Tenn. "I'm sorry that he lied to you."

"That's not your fault," Iori assures him.

"I know. But, he's my brother. I should take some of the blame for it."

"You shouldn't have to," Iori says. He doesn't realize that his hand is on top of Riku's until Riku recoils at the way Iori's grip tightens. Iori quickly removes his hand, clears his throat. "Why did he do that anyway? Why is he so against me visiting you?"

Riku turns stiff. Practically frozen in place. A pause in time as if it took all of his energy to come up with a reasonable enough answer. He finally settles. "I don't know."

"You don't?" Iori says, eyebrows raised. "But, all of this is his fault."

"All of this?"

"Isn't he the reason why you're here in the first place? Because he came back all these years later without warning, and now he doesn't want you making friends? You say you're not on good terms with him, yet you talk about him as if he were an angel. I don't understand it. Am I missing something?"

"Missing something? You're not missing anything." Riku asks, his throat is closing up. He swallows but it feels nearly impossible. "Tenn-nii is just overprotective. That's all. And we really aren't on good terms, I just admire his idol persona. That's all."

"I'm starting to think that isn't the case," Iori says, it's almost a chuckle. As if Riku's response were so untrue that he can't help but laugh.

"What are you saying? Do you think I'm lying?"

Iori raises his eyebrows, his eyes widen in a way they normally don't. Riku's eyes are stern, his lips turned downwards into a thin frown. Iori's almost afraid. Afraid of the way Riku is glaring like the edge of a dagger; the spitting image of his brother.

Yes, Iori says in his mind, You are definitely lying. But, he can't bring himself to say it, and so he lies, too. Instead, he says, "No. Why would I think that?"

Riku exhales, releasing a noise of instant relief, clutching his chest. Iori is almost glad that he lied. Almost.

"Oh, good. It's just that Tenn-nii can overreact sometimes," Riku says. He's still, and refuses to look Iori in the eye when he speaks. "I'll talk to him later this week. He's been calling me everyday. He was just jealous, maybe. That's all it is."

Iori can't stand the tension in the room. He wants things to make sense. He wants to understand what this is. He wants to understand the conflict between Riku and Tenn. He wants to know why it exists in the first place. He wants to understand himself, and why he's gotten himself caught up in all of this.

"Nanase-san? Can I ask something?" Iori asks, although he's already asked many things without permission.

"Sure." Riku is still.

"Why aren't you out of the hospital yet?"

Riku finally looks up at him, meeting his eyes. And Iori knows that he's about to tell the truth. "Well, I could have left a while ago," Riku says. "I've improved since my last attack. But I just don't have anywhere else to go. I don't want to go back with my parents. And Tenn-nii, well... you already know. I don't have any other family, and I don't have any friends to stay with either."

"What about me?" Iori asks, slightly hurt. "I'm your friend, right?"

This makes Riku laugh. It's a sound Iori wants to hold. "That's right. You are."

"Then, stay with me," he commands. Iori realizes how uncharacteristically desperate he sounds so he hides his freshly pinked face behind his hand and tries again. "What I meant to say was— You could always stay with me. If you'd like, of course."

It takes Riku a moment to speak, as if all his emotions and secret-keeping have gotten caught up in his chest. He finally manages a small, "Really?"

"Only if it's you," Iori says without thinking, and he regrets it the moment it leaves his mouth. He shyly adds, "So, will you?"

"If it's you, how can I say no?"

-

a/n:

i'm running on 4 hours of sleep while typing this zzzzz 

and sorry for not UPDATING!!!!! my bad u guys   o(╥﹏╥)o    school is messing me up... its sick i tell u. sick. and not ina good way ! however, i'll try n upload more often, thanks 4 being patient