[ EXTREME TW: aesthetic ]
one day, tony baloney woke up in a random persons bed. he didn't recognize it because it was covered in blood and sweat and a liquid he didn't recognize.
"maybe i just pissey wisseyed myself." he told himself.
but being the curious piece of shit he was, he smelt it. it smelled like his brother's suspiciously erotic coochie meow meow on halloween. it was very salty, like his best friend and secret crush's potato chips he fished out of his grandmommy's anal glands once. tony wony's crush is a hottie called dylan zippe.
little did tony lony know that he had soberly gotten very drunk last night and had gotten absolutely railed by his crush zaddy zylan.
dylie willie rolled over to face toney boney, and little tony baloney screamed. he didn't know that daddy dylbear was in bed with him.
FLASH BACK: warning! true events
"DADDY," lony tony screamed, curling his fungal infected floor gripper while zaddy daddy thrusted quickly in slow motion into his pus filled belly button.
PRESENT:
dylie poo couldn't help but rake his blue cool aid coloured eyes over tony's naked body wearing an obama cosplay. "you look like a 13 year old tampon. i think that's why i find you hot my beasty slug."
tony wony gulped. he felt his heart beat faster than me on your moms vagina. he was confused. "you think i'm a hot beasty slug?" he asks, tucking a few strands of hair behind his ear in debbie ryan style.
"of course my pube-filled hunky vegan sausage," declan knew that jayce liked him back, it was obvious to practically everyone, even me who was watching them while i was making out with queen lizzie in a 😩😝🥵😏💪💪💪. "wanna be my boy friend?" dylie willie asks smugly, already knowing both of their answers.
boney tony's 3'2 body shook with surprise and penis i mean hapenis "OF COURSE MY SEGGZY SHREK ANYS"
and that is the start to an absolutely beautifully inspiring story about two child groomers fastly falling in love in slow motion: daddy dylie willie bear and and hunky vegan sausage #love and peis 🥵🥰🥺🥺😜💪💪
<33
