I Carry a Torch for You

Chapter 4

I open my eyes slowly, Leo is already up. I head out to go see him, he's in the kitchen making eggs and bacon.

"Morning," He says when he notices me. I see the light blush on his face. "Want toast?"

I look down, not saying anything.

He gives me a knowing look, "What's wrong," He asks me gently.

And that's when I break down, my back sliding against the cabinets as my right hand hugs my knees and my left wipes my eye. Tears slide down my face. I don't remember the last time I full-on cried like this.

"Hey," He rubs my back, sitting next to me. "It's ok."

"I'm dead, I'm actually dead," I sob, leaning into him. He's been here for me this whole time, I can't imagine having to deal with this alone.

"It's ok, sh~"

"I miss my Mom," I tell him, "And my Dad," Another tear, then another, pathetic.

"So do I," He tells me with a sad expression.

"I'm sorry," I tell him.

"Don't be, I know what you're going through."

"I just want to see them again," I tell him.

"So do I."

His soul glows even brighter, and I know he notices it. He'll get to see his family again soon, and that's a great thing. He should've gone straight to Heaven like his parents, but at least he'll finally get to go see them. Very soon too, by the looks of it.

"My parents were stabbed," He tells me. "We were at a gay rights activism, they were fighting for my rights. Some white business men came. . . And I had to watch as my parents were stabbed right there on the street. I was next. I woke up a week later and realized my parents were gone."

"I'm so sorry that happened to you, you're such a good person. You didn't deserve that," What do I say? What can I say?

"You?" He asks me, "S- Sorry, you don't have to tell."

But I do tell, I trust him. "I don't know who he was. He came into my house, put a gun to my forehead, and everything went dark from there. I don't know what happened to my family, I don't know anything. But, I miss them. I miss my family, my friends, my life, everything," I turn to him, "But you being here has made me look forward to the future."

He smiles, looking into my blue eyes. And we just stand like that, not moving for who knows how long.

"Do you smell that?" I ask eventually.

"Horsefeathers!" He shouts, getting up to save his burnt breakfast.

"You're very darb!" Leo tells me with a smile.

"Huh?"

"It means you're excellent," He laughs.

What's a slang word I can use to impress this guy? Hmm. . . Got it! "You're the berries!" I tell him with a smirk, knowing I just really impressed him with my knowledge.

His smile leaves, leaving his jaw agape with wide eyes. He stares at me for a few seconds, waiting for me to talk. When I don't (instead I just stare at him confused, waiting for a reply) he shuts his mouth, thinking of what to say. "Do you know what you just said?" He asks with furrowed brows.

"Oh, um, yeah! Yeah, of course! Because I'm so smart!" I smile, looking at the tan boy as I wait.

"Hmph," He sounds unsure, as he studies my face, "What did you say then?"

"Um I called you the berries, which means. . . Which means-" Dang it, I got nothing. "Yeah I don't know, can you elaborate," I ask him.

He looks a bit disappointed as he bites his cheek, fidgeting with a piece of paper as he looks at the ground. We sit on the ground, in the same spot I cried just yesterday. His soul is glowing a faded yellow now, my time with him now limited. "Berries mean you find me attractive, I find it rather romantic personally."

"Oh, I'm sorry! I mean, you are attractive but not in a rom-" Romantic. . . Do I find him, well you know, as a love interest?

"Oh, yeah it's fine," He trails off, looking down at his old man shoes contently.

That causes me to giggle, as I cover my mouth to hopefully hide my laugh.

"What?" He asks, looking up.

"You wear old man shoes!"

"What!"

"You do!"

"I'll have you know that these shoes were the bees knees when I was alive!"

"I'm sure they were, grandpa!"

"Pft," He laughs too, causing me to laugh more as we sit on the floor a hysterical mess. Romantic. . . Is that what I want this friendship to become? A romance? I can't, right? Do I have a crush?