the reader's perspective is afab (assigned female at birth), but no gender-specific pronouns or terms are used. sexual content.
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A little bit of wine fell into the bathtub and dissipated into the clear water as you took a sip and leaned your head back. You allowed your eyes to softly close and drew in a deep breath. Missing Howl felt so heavy. A dinner plate with the meal you made for Markl and yourself was balanced on your knees just above the slowly cooling bath water. You had been in there for a bit, and Calcifer's handiwork with the temperature was fading. But you didn't notice. All you could think about was Howl's smooth voice and soft hands and...
You had tried everything you could think of to pass the time while he was away. Walks in the flower fields, royal events you attended as a mysterious stranger, and even games of dress up in his clothes didn't help. Copious amounts of wine was the only thing between you and rock bottom, and it was taking more and more to keep you afloat. It also helped with the fear. Howl had never been gone this long, and you had no idea when he'd be back. His trips never lasted more than a few days, but by this point, it had been two months. You couldn't stand crying over the paranoia of his fate any longer and had resorted to blocking out any thoughts of him being hurt. He just had a lot of people to save from the war, that's all.
The plate began to wobble as you realized you were shivering. While you were lost in thought, all the heat had drained from your bath and you were now freezing. You put the plate on the floor beside your empty wine glass and reached for a towel. The towel smelled like him. You stared at it numbly, picked up the outfit you had worn before you got in, and dried off with that instead. After putting on a clean shirt and underwear, you felt good enough to question whether you could sleep in the bed you shared with Howl that night. Only a glass and a half of wine was in your system, and more life was in you than there had been lately. There was a pile of blankets on the floor that you had been sleeping on to avoid feeling his empty depression in the mattress beside you. Maybe tonight was the night to try and go back.
You put the plate, glass, and wine bottle on your nightstand to take down in the morning and pulled back the covers. As you slowly crawled in, you realized you had misjudged your condition. Tonight was another floor night, and you had made a mistake. Your side of the mattress felt too heavy; there was nobody to balance the other side like you were used to, and it hurt. The wine bottle caught your eye and it was in your hand in less than a second.
"Who are you?" a voice said softly from the doorway. "Because you're not the well-mannered y/n I know and love, drinking straight from a bottle like that."
You wobbled and set the bottle down beside you as you looked at Howl, stunned. It was a long time that you sat and looked; you were scared it was a dream. He started to speak again, but you walked over and melted in front of him, wrapping your arms around his legs and shaking with silent sobs. His hands held your waist as he leaned over and picked you up to put you back on the bed.
"You're okay," you said as you looked up at him. "I was terrified, Howl."
"I know; I'm so sorry, y/n."
He sat next to you and held you close for a moment before whispering, "It won't happen again. I promise."
You buried your face in his neck for a moment before he took it in his hands to wipe your tears away and give you a short kiss. It wasn't enough for either of you, and you both leaned back in for a longer, deeper one. Your hands went around his neck and into his hair as his went down your torso. One of his hands lingered on your lower back as the other dropped to your thigh. It was unintentionally your inner thigh, however, which caused you to softly gasp in his mouth. You tried to act like nothing had happened, but he paused. And then you felt a small smile come across his face.
YOU ARE READING
howl pendragon x reader oneshots
FanfictionBased off Hayao Miyazaki & Studio Ghibli film Howl's Moving Castle. I think this will mostly be lemons, but there might be light stuff in here too.