In The Stars

Run

TW: Abuse, Drugs, intense Fear

Run away

run away

run to where they cant find you

hide in a simple hope

breaking down the door

they're breaking down the door

find me once more

and throw me out to the core

youre angry

yelling

screaming

seeming to be intoxicated

my life in your hands and evacuated your mind

that im your kind

im your child

scars on my body forever

you think ill just forget what you did while i was in terror

pleading that i let it go

even though you know

that this cant go away and its here to stay

replaying in my dreams

i dont sleep

trying not to see them

being taken because of me.

are you still listening?

ive talked for hours and youve said nothing

are you finally realizing

that what you did may be in the past but PTSD doesnt care

are you thinking

of how i cant forgive and forget even if i care

do you see me?

do you see me?

i worked hard to put it away for you but you try to win me over with gifts and money

you say your sober

now thats funny

you smell like marijuana and you still carry a dap pen

im not stupid dad

i cant just hide

but i wont run

i try to see you in the sun

although the moon shows a true face

and maybe i should listen to its embrace.

dad please go away..

~Dezaray Schilling