.....
I'm fine until someone says his name.
His name makes me feel disgusted.
Violated.
Horrified.
I feel it.
I feel him.
On my shoulders.
My breasts.
My body.
The shivers I felt when he leaned towards my ear.
I remember it all.
In a blink of an eye.
My body shakes.
My eyes sting.
My throat burns.
Everything feels like it's underwater.
It's like a flip of a switch.
One second I'm okay.
The next, I want to scream.
I don't want to feel him anymore.
I don't want to remember him.
And yet.
Everyone speaks of him.
To him.
About him.
My feelings mean nothing.
My trust has been broken.
I don't feel like me anymore.
But a husk of what I once was.
It's their fault.
Not mine.
If they kept him away after it happened.
I wouldn't be like this.
If they trusted my words.
If they believed me.
I would be okay.
But I'm not.
I won't be.
Nothing will make this okay.
My chest burns with hatred.
It's as if I feel no remorse for them anymore.
I want to spit venomous words at them.
They changed me.
I don't feel like me.
And yet.
People will say it's my fault.
My fault he raped me.
My fault he touched me.
My fault I made a big deal about it.
It will never be my fault.
It will always be his.
And it will forever be everyone else's fault for keeping him around.
I feel disgusted.
YOU ARE READING
My poems :)
PoetryForever is a long time, and i wouldn't mind, spending it right by your side.