The Story Of Us (Grey's Anatomy one-shots)

Begin Again (merder)

It was a cold winter day. Meredith never thought she'd ever step in this house again, but with Amelia pouting that she didn't want to go alone and children wanting to spend Christmas with their father and grandmother, she had to agree to spend her Christmas at Shepherd's household. She hasn't seen Mrs. Shepherd since she and Derek got divorced and she was pretty sure she hated her even though Derek and Amelia assured her that she still loved her. She hasn't seen Derek for a few weeks, since the last time he visited Seattle. Time without him was moving incredibly slow and even though she hated to admit it, she looked forward to spending Christmas with him again. She knew that it would cost her to spend hours with his sisters, who definitely hated her, but for her, it was worth it. She missed everything about spending Christmas with Derek, despite the fact that she hated holidays. They turned Christmas into their holiday and always celebrated it together, especially after they became parents. She always loved to see the sparkle in his eyes as they wrapped gifts for the kids and happiness in their eyes when they got to open them. For her, it was pure magic, and more than anything, she missed that.

Derek had already arrived at his mother's house when Meredith and Amelia arrived with the kids. Kids immediately run to their father, hugging him every way they could, telling him how much they missed him. Meredith didn't miss the tear in his eyes when he said that he missed them too. Derek had thought about moving back to Seattle a million times before, but always decided against it because he didn't know if it was the right thing to do. He liked his job, but he hated it. He hated that it took away the woman he loved from him and forced him to not spend all of his time with his children, who were growing up so fast. Derek greeted Mer and Amy with a hug and a kiss on the cheek, trying to have Meredith in his arms for as long as possible. Then he took their coats and suitcases and led them into the living room.
"Ma, they're here!" He called out to his mother, who was busy in the kitchen. She came out as soon as she heard him. Amelia immediately hugged her mother. They had rekindled their relationship since her visit to new york.

"Look who we have here" Carolyn smiled at the kids as they run to hug their grandmother. Even though they hadn't spent much time with her, they loved her deeply, because she was the only grandparent they had and she was always so sweet to them.
"Hello, Mrs shepherd" Meredith smiled at the older woman. She was a little nervous to be meeting her again after all that's happened with her and Derek
"How many times do I have to tell you, it's Carolyn sweetheart, Mrs. Shepherd makes me feel old." They all chuckled at that. Carolyn embraced her. Meredith was a little shocked since she didn't think she'd still be so kind to her. She thought she'd take sides in divorce but looks like she hadn't.

"You're probably hungry, lets's get you something to eat. Girls will be here soon" Mrs. Shepherd said as she led them to the kitchen.

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Christmas at Shepherd's was a special holiday. Everyone in the family was there: Carolyn's kids (even though they weren't kids anymore) with their partners and children. It was the first time in years that everyone was present and they couldn't have been happier. They were drinking hot chocolate and watching Christmas movies with the kids, snuggling with their loved ones. Meredith and Derek didn't get the chance to have a private conversation but they kept throwing each other glances every once in a while, which didn't go unnoticed by Carolyn. As much as they both hated to admit, they missed each other more than words could possibly say. The last time they saw each other almost ended with them kissing each other, but Meredith got paged and had to run to the hospital immediately, so the moment was ruined. They hadn't talked about anything other than the kids since then and they were both looking forward to it.

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"Hey," Meredith said as she walked out to the balcony. "What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be enjoying Christmas with everyone?" She asked, taken away by the fact that she found him all alone on the freezing balcony on his favorite holiday.
"Just needed fresh air. You? What are you doing here?"
"Same reason. Plus I wanted to talk to you."
"Talk about what?"
"You know what, Derek."
"I don't see anything to talk about, it was just a kiss that didn't even happen. Does it really matter?"
"No, not really." Meredith was a little hurt by Derek's ignorance but he was right, there was nothing to talk about.
"Hey, I didn't say that to upset you." His voice was sweet and reassuring.
"I'm not upset."
"Right, you're not."
"I hate that you know me too well. I hate you." She said and playfully swatted his arm.
"I'm so glad you're here, Mer. I missed spending Christmas with you." His voice was so genuine, it sent shivers down her body.
"Me too," she said as he put his arm around her shoulder and kissed her temple and she hid her face in the crook of his neck. They stood like that for a few minutes. There was complete silence, but it was never uncomfortable. They stood there and a million thoughts came in their heads, one of them being the desire to kiss one another.
Neither of them let that thought become reality, they silently let go of each other and looked into the distance that was lightened up by the Christmas lights.
She was the first to break the silence.
"I lost a patient yesterday. Same age as you, almost the same height, the same injuries you had when you were in an accident. That day I thought I lost you forever, even though you weren't mine anymore. And yesterday the woman I promised I'd do everything my power to save her husband, lost him. Every single time I come across a similar case like yours, I can't help but think how my life would be if you had died that die. I'd be a widow without a right to be a widow, because I was no longer your wife. And that made me feel so stupid and irresponsible because I didn't fight for us, because I was selfish enough to only see my pain when you were losing yourself and I had no idea, and because I let you go. I wanted to be mad at you. I needed for you to be a villain in my story. I needed that to not think about you, to not care about you, to not wonder every day if you were okay, or if you were just as maimed and bruised as me. And I look at you now. And I want to hate you. I have to because otherwise I'll start caring about you, and I can't do that. Except no matter what I do I still care. I still care and I hate myself. And I hate that I have no other option but to love you. And I wanna hate you, except I hate me for loving you so much that I'm ready to forgive you, to forgive me, to forgive us for every stupid thing we did, for every way we hurt each other. I'm ready to forgive and forget it all just because I love you. And I miss you so much. Because you weren't just my husband. You were my best friend, you were my everything. And I can't help but still want to have all of that with you. And no, this is not me saying to pick me, choose me and love me. That was probably the lamest thing I've ever done" both chuckle "but I just think you deserve to know the truth, and I deserve to be able to express how I feel, because I'm tired of beating myself up for loving you. And I can see on your face that you're trying to be respectful and wait 'till I finish talking so you can kiss me but don't you think we've already waited too long, Derek?" She had barely finished her words when Derek grabbed her face and kissed her passionately. It set both their bodies on fire. They hadn't felt that flame that was burning inside them for almost four years and they had no idea how much they missed it. He wrapped his arms around her body as she wrapped her's around his neck. His tongue was demanding for the entrance in her mouth, which she almost immediately granted.
"Derek" she panted as they let go of each other, unable to breathe.
"I love you, Mer," he told her "I love you and I have for forever, and I always will. I spent every day since the day I left wanting to come back, and now I wish I knew that you wanted me to. I wish I had stopped being a coward way before this, but I can not turn back time. I can not give you back the time we already lost, but I'm going to spend the rest of my life making sure that we won't waste any more time. I thought DC was everything, and I was wrong. You, you are everything. I love you, and I'm not gonna stop loving you. Mer, I can't live without you, I don't wanna live without you, and I'm gonna do everything in my power to prove it."
"I love you, Derek, I love you so much." That was all she could say before he kissed her again. This time it was gentle, reassuring that they could make it. They broke the kiss as she rested her forehead against his, their noses touching. Snow glimmering with the reflection of Christmas lights and happy noises coming from the living room was promising them a happy future, the one where they'd get to die when they're 110 in each other's arms.

Hey! I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoed writing. I've wanted to start writing one-shots but I didn't know where to start. I don't know when I'll post next one or what it'll be about, but I promise I'll try my best for it to be entertaining. Thanks for reading <3