The Holiday Killer ✔️

Ch. 21 Hidden Scars

"You think he's—?" Crosshairs asks, worried.
"No, I don't think so. I want to talk to Rung about this tomorrow. You can come with me."
This doesn't help Crosshairs not worry about Drift, but he agrees to meet Inferno at Rung's office tomorrow morning. The two go to the cafeteria before Drift questions where they are.

"Can I see her?" The two hear Lily ask Drift, uncertain if she's allowed to, but not because Sunstreaker is sitting next to her.
"I should have thought about what you two want regarding the three of us visiting. At least it seems like Ratchet is letting you two decide," Sunstreaker explains once Crosshairs and Inferno sit at the table.
Crosshairs and Drift assume Lily would stay for ten minutes since Jamie is unconscious. They agree to let her go to the medbay with them.
Crosshairs now pays close attention to Drift's facial expressions and movements. All he sees is the sadness and worry he's seen over the past six days.

Ratchet isn't sure if Lily should see Jamie, but the two other medics, Jamie's guardians, the terror twins, and Inferno, argue they can't have Lily avoid seeing Jamie when she's like this as they watch Lily sitting by the bed. They know the concern is if Jamie could decline, but Jolt informs everyone that the chemical level is decreasing.
Lily stares at Jamie, hating what Jamie goes through and knowing there's worse she deals with.
Is this really a break from the Autobots dealing with the killer? She wonders. Even if they can only monitor Jamie.
"Are you ok?" Sunstreaker asks her.
"I can't believe she has dealt with this for nineteen years," Lily replies, but doesn't want to leave.
The others know it'll take time for Lily to get used to this. No one can see Jamie in medbay without worrying she'll decline.
Sunstreaker is thinking of seeing if Lily can read at least Jamie's guardians' notes on Jamie's condition, knowing the rule about letting people see patients' files. He still doesn't think he made the wrong choice by letting Lily see Jamie, and neither do Crosshairs, Drift, Jasmine, or Jolt. 

Lily stays for an hour before wanting to watch T.V. The others didn't think she'd try to get Drift to come with her.
"Should we be concerned that she knows?" Crosshairs whispers to Ratchet.
"She's seen how close Drift and Jamie are. It's easy to figure out how hard this affects him," Ratchet explains.
"Apparently, you don't worry enough for her not to worry about you," Jolt jokes, "I'm kidding," he quickly adds, seeing Crosshairs' displeased expression.
"Lily can tell that you know Jamie will be ok while Drift is on edge, thinking Jamie can decline even though she's out of what we consider the danger zone for that to happen," Jasmine adds.
Crosshairs kisses Jamie's forehead before going to the lounge room.

Crosshairs is happy to see Drift relaxed even if he looks ready for bed.
"So, I take it he has gotten little sleep all week?" Sunstreaker whispers.
"No, I've been getting enough sleep to not be exhausted, but it's been light sleep."
"We need to figure something out for the next time," Sideswipe insists.
"How about tonight?" Inferno jumps in, "I can stay in your room. If I get caught, I'll say I couldn't sleep."
"And get a lecture about not waking him up," Sunstreaker adds.
"At least Crosshairs would get better sleep," Inferno argues.
"Not a great distraction from that aft, but we need to deal with this," Sunstreaker comments.

Before Drift wakes up, Inferno returns to his room early the next morning, not expecting Crosshairs to be up. They plan on waiting for Drift to be up to go to the cafeteria. Once Drift is with Jamie in the medbay, they'll talk to Rung.

Drift holds Jamie as he lies on the bed. She no longer needs oxygen support.
"She'll be waking up today," Crosshairs smiles, "this is the stage when we can know for sure."
Crosshairs sticks to the plan and will talk to Rung with Inferno.

"... I worry that Drift believes he's failed Jamie and is suicidal," Inferno finishes.
"I don't think it's so much he believes he failed as guardian and friend," Rung explains, "there's definitely guilt from all the cybertronians he's killed as Deadlock. With Jamie, he knows it's out of our control if she dies from a severe flare-up, and we're doing the best to keep her safe."
"But it's not enough," Inferno adds.
Inferno knows he means when Jamie is critical. Both mechs know Rung is also talking about Jamie's self-inflicted injuries, which everyone now knows about.
"It's like with Sunstreaker and Jamie's relationship; they both have hidden scares that only we see. Though not everyone will know all of Sunstreaker and Jamie's scares," Rung explains, "like Lily still has much to learn about the terror twins, and now she'll learn about Jamie. Also, Drift fell for Jamie like anybot, and human falls in love. Not hoping he can undo all the killing by protecting a human who's been hurt so much."
Inferno feels like he has all he came for and leaves, but Rung has Crosshairs stay and sit on the couch.

"Did Inferno trick me into talking to you?" Crosshairs asks, smiling.
"No, but you're Drift's closest friend aside from Jamie. I don't believe you're doing fine."
Crosshairs sighs, "I'm not worried about the flare-up, she should wake up today, but it's hard watching her mental struggle. It feels like all we can do is keep her safe — which I failed — rather than helping her."
Crosshairs knew he'd be asked what happened. Rung feels like he needs to talk to Crosshairs and Drift as he listens to Crosshairs.
Crosshairs isn't sure if Drift will be pissed that Rung wants to talk to both of them but lets Rung go to the medbay with him. 

Inferno is worried about seeing Rung with Crosshairs. The three medics worry they've missed something serious but know Rung is doing his job as a psychiatrist.
"You can use my office, Rung," Ratchet tells him.
"I'll take her," Inferno insists, sitting on the other chair. He takes Jamie from Drift and watches him leave the room with Crosshairs and Rung, "I wish you understood how much we love and care about you. I know we have spent little time together since I came to Earth, but it's enough for me to worry about you."

Rung tries to get Drift to tell him how he's been feeling watching Jamie's mental struggle. Hoping adding that he won't be in trouble will get him to talk. Crosshairs worries Drift thinks he set him up to talk to Rung, and he's not sure if he should say anything.
Drift tells Rung exactly what Crosshairs told him, but adds he's worried he'll lose the human he loves. Neither thought he'd tell them he knows some think his behavior is ridiculous. Even if Crosshairs does many of the same actions. 
"No, Drift, we're not doing anything ridiculous. We're dealing with a human who's been neglected in a way humans don't deem a problem," Crosshairs assures him, "even if it happens on Cybertron, it's rare compared to what we've seen on Earth here and Jamie's dimension," Crosshairs hugs Drift, "come on, let's go back to Jamie."
Rung tells the two that they should talk to him, and like with Ratchet, no one will know about the conversations. Hoping they'll be back in his office soon. He watches Drift take Jamie from Inferno, and Crosshairs sit on the other chair next to Drift. He walks into the room, standing by the wall with Inferno. 

"So, when are we going to kill more humans? It's been nearly a week!"
"He has a plan."
"He has a hit list, doesn't he? Ugh, and I thought we were killing humans for fun!"
The associate transforms, and the large louder drives off.
"I take it he found out why you're helping me?" Austin asks.
"Yeah, it's strange helping a human, but I see how the Autobots have gotten in your way," a silver robot the size of a human appears next to Austin, "Frenzy will help you with the next phase. I hope one day infiltration is a mission we Decepticons can do, but we don't have holoforms like the Autobots yet. Took Megatron this long to decide it's useful."
"Perhaps I could help?"
The associate smiles at the idea, even though they don't know if Megatron will like it. For now, Frenzy is prepared for his mission...