First Screening of 83 ft. Class of '83

Chapter 5

"Yaar Kaps gussa toh nahi karega?" asked Kirti, pausing to glance at Patil in the mirror. "Kal match hai."

"Arey usko pata kaise chalega," pointed out Patla (with flawless logic). "Wo toh doodh pee kar ab tak so bhi gaya hoga."

The bunch of Kirti, Maddi, Yash, Shastri, Roger, Vally and Ballu, led by their night captain Patla sneaked down the corridor, hushing each other.

"Tell Kaps we used to do this all the time and he never got to know," Madan whispered to Jimmy.

Jimmy passed on the message.

"Tell Maddi pa just because I didn't try to stop them doesn't mean I didn't know," Kapil whispered to Jimmy.

Jimmy passed on the message.

"Tell Kaps—" began Maddi, but was interrupted by Kapil's satisfied, "Ah, here it is—"

"Oho. Kaha chal di baraat?" asked Kapil.

Patla, being the smartest, had quickly hidden himself around the bend of the corridor.

"World Cup ka pehla match jeete, socha celebrate karte—" said Kirti and Ballu gave an enormous fake laugh out of nervousness. "Chalega?"

"Na baba. Mai din ka kaptaan theek hu..." Kapil glanced around the bend to spot Patla. "Night captain Patla hai. Inko teri tarah fast pitch me batting karne ka experience nahi hai...helmet pehna diyo."

Amidst the laughter all around, Chirag muttered to himself, "This is the weirdest role I've ever done in my life," which only made his dad laugh harder.

"Kal ground pe kisiki ubaasi nikli aur maine dekh liya toh dekh lena!" threatened Kapil behind the partygoers. "Kirti!...Shararti..."

"Bye Kaps!"

"Tell Kaps his threats never worked on us," Maddi whispered to Jimmy.

Jimmy passed on the message.

"Tell Maddi pa—"

Jimmy sighed. "Why can you both not speak directly?"

"Because," began Kapil but stopped as Jim pa appeared on the screen.

"Ha bhai...kitthe chaliye, Kaps?"

"Jim pa...ball ghis ghis ke trouser laal ho gaya hai...it look bad. Laundry le jana hai."

"Ghar se money order aya hai?" asked Jimmy skeptically. "O Kaka...ek din ke 15 pound milte hai hume. Ha? Laundry ne 10-12 pound le lene hai tujhse. Itne me toh nayi jean aa jani hai..."

"Toh phir?"

"Aape dho le..."

Kapil studied the trousers in his arms in alarm. "Paaji maine zindagi me aaj tak rumal bhi nahi dhoya...I never done."

"Oye Kaka...isse pehle toh tune kabhi West Indies ko bhi nahi dhoya tha. You never done!" Jimmy copied his English teasingly, but in the nicest way possible. "Harr cheez ka first time hota hai yaara."

If Kaps sat down to count the number of times he'd told Jim pa he was the best vice-captain anyone could ever had asked for, and there was no way in hell they'd have won the World Cup if he wasn't the vice-captain, he'd run out of fingers.

But he repeated it anyway.

"You're the best vice-captain in the universe, Jim pa."

"Yeah, well, you've said that before," said Jimmy.