She's perfect and I hate it

Contemplation

 

  "Tadashi, do you wanna go out today ?"

  Yes, yes please, Tsuki! Do you like me now ? Am I good enough for you now ?!

  "Sure, Tsuki. What's the occasion ?"

  "My girlfriend bailed on me last minute, so I have nothing to do now."

  Oh. I'm still your second choice ? Okay, that's okay, second choice is better than not being a choice, right ?

"Oh, that sucks. Don't worry, we'll have a great day!"

"Thanks, Yamaguchi."

He nodded, threw their clothes in the wash, and laid back in bed. Tsukishima laid with him, cuddled him close and Yamaguchi damn near cried again. Tears glazed his eyes and

"Tsuki...why don't you love me ?"

It was barely a whisper, choked out because of the tight knot in his throat, willing himself not to cry. Kei didn't reply. Not a single word. Just held him closer while he cried, kissed away his tears and coaxed him to sleep.

When Yamaguchi woke up, Kei was gone. It was 2pm so he assumed Tsuki had went home to start getting ready, he picked up his phone to call him.

Ring...Ring...
T.K- You're finally awake ?
Y.T- Yeah, I'm gonna start getting ready, do you wanna go to the cat cafe ?
T.K- Actually, she called back and she's free now, so I was gonna go on that date.
Y.T- Oh, alright. I hope you two have a good time!
T.K- Thank you, Tadashi. Bye.

"Bye..." Tadashi trailed off, noticing Kei had hung up the phone before he could respond.

Tadashi looked between his bed and his door, longing for the comfort of his soft mattress, But his stomach ached for something, anything to fill this gap.

  Another night, binge eating and crying. Overthinking and then starving himself for days, his last thought, before he drifts off for the second time today

  "Am I even worth it at all ?"

  And then it was lights out for him.