Covet

| Mind Games

The rain was an omen. Hard pelts thrashed against the eaves, gathering in down streams on the corrugated shop roof. The mechanic shop was alive with the clanging of tools, whirring machines, and the faint smell of oil and engine grease. Cars in various states of disrepair were scattered throughout the space. At the same time, an assortment of well-worn tools hung on a pegboard against one wall.

The rest of this week had plateaued, less drama, less dreams, less everything. I was committed to making this work for whatever duration I was here. Antoine hadn't texted yet, and I started to see a future without dark clouds over my head. Maybe he had simply forgotten about me and moved on.

Ignoring the rain, I had a renewed sense of optimism. Benton may not have been the thorn in my summer's side I had once thought. This had much to do with Paul. I couldn't shake the permanent grin on my face. I had done what he's asked and been rewarded for it. I reached out and regularly. From his first text to his last, I'd allowed myself to send random observations, funny memes, and other anecdotal stuff. I refused to see anything in the now lightning speed of his reply.

Whenever he was nearby, my hormones hit a fever pitch. Most nights, after work, we spent the nights talking in his truck on the way home. I never needed to ask him to stay over, he just knew when I needed him too, and was often gone by morning. The color returned to my face. During the days, he kept his hands in check and his mouth nowhere even close to mine. We talked, we slept, and he left me hanging.

There was a gnawing side thought in my head that played on a loop, reminding me my time here was limited. Anything instigated would never survive the distance I was still intent on putting between myself and Benton as soon as a sale could be completed. Arthur was stalling and only yesterday declared Lucille's house would need a structural evaluation. To make matters worse, the part had not arrived for my car, and despite Luke's promises that it would come, I was still reliant on Jenny or Paul.

Paul cut across the shop, a smile already plastered on his face. Before I knew it, I was smiling back. My heart and head waged war. I had to leave town at some point. It was clear he would never have any intention to leave Benton, and I would never stay longer than needed. So why was I also fanning a flame that could spark a revolution inside?

After a busy start, Jenny excused herself to make coffee. Despite the various cars and customers, I hadn't seen Luke. I searched his back office with a bag full of purple slips. He needed to know if he was hemorrhaging money into bank accounts that should no longer exist. When I got to his room, Luke wasn't there either. Paul was on his phone instead, and his brows inched up when he saw me. The grin he gifted me next made me smile.

Their conversation revolved around stock and late deliveries from a supplier, but although he was firm with whoever was on the end of the line, there was a sense he was only being half serious with them. With his eyes moving back to his computer screen, I decided my conversation about purple slips could wait until later. Before I could leave the room, his hand caught my arm, dragging me back with a gentle tug. He shook his head and mouthed the word "stay."

The cramped office had a front window overlooking the shop floor. There was space for a desk, laptop, and a single swivel seat. With nowhere else to go, I perched on the chair's armrest. Paul's eyes scanned the order on the laptop screen while his hand scrolled with a mouse. He is gorgeous. Without his eyes on me, I took a moment to take him in. I bit down on my lip, forcing my thoughts into submission. It is useless. A larger part of me wanted that revolution.

Paul's hands froze. He swallowed, and I caught the movement in his throat. There was silence except for the person on the other end of the line asking him if he was still there. The continual buzzing sound in my head began. I thought I'd kicked this headache, but it was going to be another day for Tylenol.