New Year's Eve

CHAPTER 6

Helena

His eyes burn through me, keeping me from concentrating. And when Marcel's lips graze mine, I start to lose touch with reality.

Kissing Marcel seems to be my new favorite pastime.

We kiss for an unforgivably long time, but I don't want to stop. I love this feeling of elation. Every cell in my body is overflowing with euphoria. It's been too long since I've been with a man and this kiss feels so delicious. My soul is drawn to this magnificent man. My heart overflows with a multitude of emotions that I myself cannot unravel. I want only one thing, that this kiss would never end.

Unfortunately, time is impossible to stop, and in a couple of minutes Marcel pulls away from me. I feel disappointment spreading through my body.

"I could get used to it", he said, gently stroking my cheek with the thumb of his right hand.

I think I'm used to it, I thought. But that's not what I'm saying.

"I don't think so. There won't be a next time, Monsieur Lambert."

His quiet laughter fills the space around him.

"I wouldn't be so sure, Marshmallow", he takes my hand now, "Will you dance with me?"

How could I refuse? Marcel heads toward the small, ornate staircase that leads directly to the roof. Now we are alone. The music is muffled from below and there is a beautiful view of the city ahead.

"It's beautiful up here."

"I know", he says near my ear, and then starts circling me.

Once again it feels like I'm floating. Until today, I'd been sure I couldn't dance at all. But now, spinning with Marcel under the starry night sky, I realize how wrong I was. My body follows Marcel's movements perfectly. It's as if we were made for each other. Now time stops. Even the planet itself slows down while I'm drowning in this man's eyes.

"You'll think I'm crazy, but I'm insanely glad you spilled your coffee on me."

"You wouldn't believe it, ma chérie, but I'm unspeakably happy about this coincidence myself", he said playfully, "I think this is the best Christmas I've had in a very long time."

"You flatter me", I'm not even going to hide how happy I am to hear you say that.

"And I didn't think so, I always tell it like it is. I also want to kiss you again, Marshmallow."

Is that how I'm supposed to resist this man? Next to him, I really do become like a soft, pliable marshmallow. He can do whatever he wants to me.

"Don't worry, I won't kiss you."

"What? I don't understand his mood swings."

"I'll wait until you kiss me first", he dazzled me with his smile again.

"What a conceit."

Half an hour later, though, we head back inside. The cold wind is making itself felt, and Marcel and I are dressed very lightly. This really is the best Christmas of my life. Without any it seems. And now I realize how pathetic I would be if I were alone tonight.

As the hand of the clock passes midnight, the holiday slowly begins to wind down. I ask Marcel to take me back to my hotel. I can see that he doesn't like this arrangement, but the man says nothing about it. I don't want this night to come to an end. But sooner or later the fairy tale ends, giving way to an ugly reality.

This time, Marcel is driving at a low speed. A treacherous smile appears on my face as I think about the reasons for this behavior.

"What amuses you so much, marshmallow?", he asks as his gaze wanders over my body.

"The road is completely empty."

"And?"

"And you're walking like my grandmother."

"Are you so eager to get rid of my company?"

"I didn't say that."

"Then we have nowhere to hurry", he winked.

"What if I'm tired and want to sleep?", I like teasing him so much. I physically feel the pleasure of it.

"I'm sure that's not true. That's not what you want at all."

"Turns out you can read minds, too."

"No, not thoughts. Your desires", our gazes meet again, and it's like lightning strikes me.

An electric current runs through my body, pushing my pulse to its maximum speed. It's crazy. I look away and try to catch my breath. What was that?

The bottom of his eyes clearly read passion and lust. It felt as if every atom in the cabin of the car was impregnated with the intoxicating smell of passion.

We don't talk the rest of the way. He's watching the road, I'm looking out the window. When we arrive at the hotel, Lambert remains silent. But as soon as I get out of the car, he follows me.

"What are you doing?", I ask when the man stops in front of me.

"I'm going to see you off. If you don't mind, of course."

But, as you've already realized, I can't refuse him. We go up to the third floor, where my room is. We're still silent. It's only at the door to my room that Marcel breaks the silence.

"Thank you for this evening, Helena", he says seriously, probably for the first time calling my name.

"I was glad to spend it with you, too", I answered the guy honestly.

We stand in front of each other, and I am enveloped in longing. I realized that I didn't want Marcel to leave. I do what I promised I wouldn't do before. I close my eyes and press my lips to his. Our kiss is slow and unhurried. But it makes the fire inside me even hotter.

"I told, you'd want to kiss me yourself", he grinned defiantly, breaking the kiss.

Whatever happens. Maybe I won't see him again after this night. I don't want to think about the consequences or how wrong it is. I'm tired of the perpetual control. Tonight I want to make the most of what fate offers me.

I take a deep breath and say boldly.

"Do you want to come to my place?"