I might or might not delete this later, but if you happen to see this, please read, PLEASE!!!
I'm trying to get over a toxic friendship I had with someone that implied we were in a relationship when we weren't, they were very impulsive and I felt forced and manipulated to continue the whole sh*t. Nothing bad happened to me physically, I just feel bad that I didn't listen to the people that warned me about that person, also the fact that I let them destroy me... It's hard to forget everything and move on, I tried using yt hypnosis and it helped by surpressing the memories and not making me think a lot about it, but it's not yet gone and I'm scared of talking to anyone about it so I just decided to write here, bc I feel safer here. I have someone that I can talk to about this, but I'm tired of bragging my problems to them and I can tell they are tired too, but they always tell me that they are up for a chat with me.
Idk what I'm feeling, I just feel guilt, a lot of guilt for what I did, for staying with that person that destroyed me mentally and was awful with my friends and family... Idk if I'll ever be forgiven, if I'll ever heal and be ok again like I always was. I miss being that nice girl on the internet that wrote and did fanart without having all this problems in her mind... I miss the person I used to be, time turned me into a liar, anxious and guilty person...
I try to do everything possible to survive this mess, but I always fall down again.. I cannot afford a therapist if you ask, nor can I tell my family about this incident..... I used free help from the internet, like hypnosis and different tips, but it's still not enough, time just passing by won't fix everything on its own... If anyone's ever up for a chat, I just wanna talk about this, I can't move on alone, believe me, I tried.... I don't trust anybody, but at this point a lil chat can work ig... I know many people stopped reading my books and it's due to my innactivity, I'm very sorry for everything...
I'm very sorry again for my innactivity but this was the main problem of everything besides school..
I just wanna live normally like other people my age, why do I have to always suffer?...
Thanks for reading this, but idk when I'm coming back online, I might have mental breakdowns and other stuff, expect everything...
YOU ARE READING
Soulworker Oneshots(mostly Haruwin) (TEMPORARLY DISCONTINUED)
FanfictionHello I decided to write in this story till I find an ending for my old one and even after I find an ending!^^ (I already found an ending to my book, check it out! :D ). Few notes: I'm not a nsfw writer, so I won't write anything like that, I'm sor...
