plums 'n roses l jongsang

spray it for me everynight

blood mentioned

"god, it's too high," yeosang grumbles when the red compartment they were in reached the peak of the ferris wheel.

the boy across just chuckles at him and leans forward, running his fingers through the soft, light brown locks, brushing the hair out of his face.

"it's so pretty tonight," yeosang says as he turns to look out of the compartment, the bright, colourful lights of the carnival shining right into his eyes.

"i wish we could be up here forever, no school, no bills, just us-"

"i like you, yeosang hyung."

yeosang stops talking, his body stiffening. something strong surges through his veins, his heart thumping loudly in his throat, completely unprepared for what came to him.

"i can tell" he tries saying, but his lips wouldn't move to let the breath out thats stuck in his throat.

he was still looking out of the compartment, knowing damn well that the other boy was looking at him, internally begging for his attention.

for a reply, for eye contact, anything.

but he got nothing.

awkward silence envelopes them this time, the tension so thick you could cut it a knife.

yeosang thinks about it, their moments together.

all the times the other boy got gifts for him randomly, ranging from sketchbooks to new skateboards, the times their cheeks flushed red like apples together, the hug they shared last winter.

"i see," the boy finally spoke once they neared the ground, his head lowered and a sigh escapes from between his lips.

guilt gnaws at yeosang, the unspoken words tormenting his mind as they step out of the compartment's doors. even the young girl, who mans the ride, glances at them worriedly for a second.

they brisk walked through the field under the clear autumn night, stars littering the sky like fairy lights.

the boy walks a step ahead of yeosang, his back slouched, hands deep in the pockets of his jacket.

yeosang chews on his bottom lip. nothing is going to work if i don't say anything.

the small, pink glass bottle, gifted to him from the other male, was always in his pocket. he never pulled off the cap after that first test spray, the liquid too precious for a person like him to waste.

but yeosang figured that now was a good time to, to get his attention.

it was going to be less romantic to accept a love confession minutes after the actual confession, but he paid no mind.

yeosang speeds up his walking before it turns into a sprint, the boy walking way too fast for it to be normal.

the boy quickly glances at the road before dashing across towards the other side.

"jjong, slow down--ah!" yeosang squeaks when he accidentally steps onto a loose shoelace.

he knows he's about to fall face first into hard concrete, he knew his hands weren't going to stop him in time, he was going to crack his skull open and spill out all its contents.

he barely catches sight of the blinding lights and loud rumbling of an incoming truck.

and so he shuts his eyes tightly, wishing that he would be dripping in blood, wishing that he would get run over by that truck and get his guts flattened and a concussion when he opened them again. get that over and done with.

he deserved it all for not replying to the boy. his boy.