A Crack on Slap

Episode 6: Stabbin' Cabin!

Everyone situated themselves in their spots and resumed watching the show.

The opening theme played and switched to Connie yelling at Armin.

"Armin! Armin, wake the fuck up!" the bald boy shook him by the shoulders as his vision cleared. Armin continued to stare as Connie yelled, "hey! Handle your shit! ARMIN, can you hear the words I'm speaking to you?" Connie let go of his shoulders and looked at his hand, "wait. Why are your cheeks so sweaty?"

"Nope. It was the titan spit," Connie shuddered.

Armin looked up at the other boy and Connie slowly realized, "aww, shit. He overdosed."

"I suppose this is what I get," Armin sighed.

"No, this is what you get for not mixing it right the first time," Eren shook his head in mock disappointment.

"Shit, you right."

"Stay with me Armin. What happened?" asked Connie.

Armin gasped and his blank face converted to horror, 'ACID FLASHBACKS!'

Various scenes featuring his squad mates dying flashed as Armin's mouth widened and pupils dilated.

Armin scratched his scalp and pulled at his hair, "The spiders are in my hair." Then he doubled over, "no, Mr. Whiskers. Bad kitty! Bad, bad kitty!"

"Shit," Connie knew the situation was bad but after seeing that, he realized the gravity of what Armin felt during his original breakdown.

"This is less embarrassing than what I actually said," Armin gave a nervous laugh, remembering how he spewed about his uselessness and suicidal desires.

"Ah, he's tripping balls," Connie hovered his hands around Armin.

Armin continued, still not aware of himself, "blood boiling from the insides and I can feel little spiders crawling up from my belly."

Hange turned to Armin, "so would you say the spiders are originating from your body or materializing right onto your skin?"

Armin blinked. "...Mr. Whiskers, it's alright. They will never know," he whispered like a gremlin.

"Armin, why are you doing this? Like I get that in the other world it's normal but why?" asked Jean.

"It's fun. I don't know why you have to shit on my parade, like damn," said Armin.

"And so the pure boi is no longer pure," Hange dramatically sobbed.

"Was he ever, though?" Eren asked, knowing fully what Armin knew of by being book smart. Hell, he learned about sex-ed before Grisha ever decided to teach Eren anything medical.

"Shhh," Armin put a finger over his friend's mouth, "we don't talk about that."

"We really need to get him medical attention," Connie shouted to Ymir. "Armin, stay with me!"

Said boy was still squeezing his ears to his head and shaking fiercely.

As Connie asked, "what happened to Eren?" Armin gasped and snapped out of his acid trip.

"Isn't it obvious dumbass?" asked Ymir, back turned to Connie. "Eren and all are dead; all that's left is lightweight over here. Too bad really."

"You know who isn't a lightweight though?" asked Armin.

"Me," said Eren.

"It's true. I can confirm," Sasha said turning slightly green thinking about the last time she got drunk. Connie and Jean nodded in agreement.