Beyond The Depths

Chapter 23

I screamed, the voice like shards of glass in my heart. I felt him swim closer, but I refused to look at him, to lift my head from Kai's chest.

When he spoke again, his lips inches from my ear, I barely stopped myself from flinching. "Despair, hopelessness, anxiety, depression... They eat at you, day after day, never stopping until all that's left is a lifeless husk. You know how to make it go away. The only question is, can you do it?"

Tiger Shark's voice was like a magnet, drawing me closer and closer until I couldn't escape. Wasn't that what I wanted? A life free of feeling, of the exhaustion from having to push all the emotions down, all day, every day? A small voice in the very back of my head warned me against it, to remember what I was really fighting for.

Seeing the joy in Aunt Bella and Uncle David's faces as they laughed and smiled with their children. Hearing the happiness in Mom's laughter as she watched Drew during his cometball games; seeing the sparkle in the young merman's eyes as he laughed and joked with his teammates.

If I stopped feeling, I would never again feel the overwhelming love and gratitude for my husband and parents. I'd never again feel the joy of teaching; of seeing Drew play cometball. Of course, there's always a negative side to feeling. All the horrible emotions—anger, depression, fear, heartache—they'll always be right beside the positive emotions, waiting for a chance to strike.

I lifted my head, meeting his cold gaze. The eyes of my mother—minus the love and affection—stared back at me. He lifted his eyebrows as he waited for me to speak. My voice was strong and confident when I opened my mouth. "I will never be like you. You're heartless and self-centered. And I know why. You've never truly been loved. Your whole life, all you've focused on is power." I felt more than saw the words hit their mark.

Tiger Shark's face crumpled; his body went limp. Instead of responding, he swam over to Mom, gazing into her eyes. "My daughter. Do you even know how heartbroken I was by what happened to you? I blamed myself; I felt helpless. I stayed away and focused on becoming so powerful that I would never again have to watch any of the people I loved suffer. But, I admit, I became selfish and greedy. I craved more power. However, my creating the Lost Soul Pendant caused more harm than good."

His voice almost wavered on the last word, but he managed to steady it. "I never meant to hurt you." I was surprised to see tears gleaming in his eyes.

She was motionless in the water; her face was deathly pale, her eyes wide. But, I noticed, she wasn't meeting Tiger Shark's gaze. In fact, it didn't even seem like she knew he was there. That's when I realized—he wasn't. He was an illusion, a hallucination. I looked around at the others to see if they'd noticed him.

"They can't see or hear me. Only you can. I see you, Isadora. You can try to fight those horrible emotions, push them down until they can't touch you—or you can let them speak. If you let them, they will guide you." His face took on a wistful look as he swam back over to me, touching my cheek. "Do what I wasn't smart enough to."

I shuddered, tears springing to my eyes. I covered my face with my hands and wept. But I wasn't crying for myself. No; I was crying for Mom, for the childhood she'd never gotten. And, I realized with a jolt, for Tiger Shark. Underneath all of the pain, regret, anger, and helplessness was a father just trying to make amends with his oldest daughter.

His voice echoed as his image flickered before my eyes. I sank to the ground, sobbing openly. I couldn't—wouldn't—do it. No amount of power was worth shutting my feelings off. "What do you really want?" I asked, my voice breaking. "From what you've just told me, it doesn't sound like power is what you're really after. So tell me the truth."

It was too late. His image faded before he could respond. "No!" I shouted, voice cracking. Kai glanced at me, alarmed by my shout.

"Izzy, what's wrong?" He asked, flicking his gaze up and down my body to check for injuries. But he wouldn't find any. No; I wasn't physically injured. The cracking deep inside me came from my heart, a soul wound I wasn't sure would ever be healed.

I swiped at my eyes, breathing unevenly. "Mom," I cried. Her own were filled with worry as she swam over to us. She took my hand and as she did, I closed my eyes. I felt a hand slip into my own and I didn't flinch when I opened my eyes. "I know what I have to do."

Three pairs of confused eyes stared back at me, concern etched on their faces. My breathing hitched as I looked at my husband and parents in turn, my heart shattered into a million pieces. "I need all of you to gather as many mermaids and mermen you can from Pelathas, Aegrem, Nepptheas, Aquireth—all the surrounding towns—and tell them to meet us at Rosewood Manor. If they're unfamiliar with it, let them follow you." My eyes were red-rimmed and brimming with tears.

Dad shook his head, eyes locked on my own. "Isadora, are you okay? What's going on?"

I wished I could explain. But I couldn't. Not yet. It was all I could do to keep from collapsing into a sobbing mess. When everyone was finally assembled at Rosewood Manor, my hands were trembling so violently I couldn't control them. My mother and husband swam to either side of me. Kai and Mom took my hands while Dad was hidden among the crowd. He was going to translate for Mom.

I looked at the crowd, the rows and rows of confused faces, smiling through my tears. "Thank you all for coming today. For years, this manor was Tiger Shark's home. Hidden from prying eyes, he used the secrecy to create the Lost Soul Pendant. He originally created it to bring him power, to ensure that he never again felt powerless. Eventually, he discovered that he could use the energies of the souls still trapped in the pendant to bring others back to life. But, as always, there was a hitch, one he didn't count on. Using too much of the pendant's energy would eventually, over time, drive the user insane."

My voice wavered as I took a steadying breath. "Despite the risks, he continued using the pendant, heedless of the side effects. And, indeed, one day, it happened. After his..." I paused, hesitating. "Unfortunate death, the pendant was presumed missing. Until a year ago, when it mysteriously turned up."

I swiped at my eyes, forcing my tears back. "Tiger Shark may have committed some sins of his own using the pendant, but deep down, all he really wanted was to make amends with his oldest daughter, my mother. He was just a desperate father trying to heal the sins of his past. That's why..." I trailed off, swallowing hard. This was it.

Kai squeezed my hand, the motion drawing my gaze to his. He didn't know what was coming—none of them did—but just knowing he supported me gave me the courage to keep going. "That's why I—with my parents' okay, of course—am officially opening Rosewood Manor to the public. It's time to stop hiding the past and embrace the future. It's not for sale, but I think everyone needs to be able to see for themselves what really happened here—to make peace with it."

A surprised gasp from my left made me turn my head. Mom had a hand over her mouth, tears brimming in her eyes. Dad's eyes were impossibly wide, glancing from Mom back to me. He'd just finished relaying the message to Mom, but I could see he was just as surprised as she was. I could automatically tell by the pride in their eyes that it was absolutely okay.

Suddenly, it was all I could do not to collapse from exhaustion. My shoulders suddenly bowed, eyes squeezing shut, then opening wide in an attempt to stay awake. Kai noticed, hurriedly putting an arm around my shoulder.

He must have said something to Dad, but his voice had already started floating in and out of my ears at that point, so I just closed my eyes and let the heavy exhaustion that was slowly creeping up on me embrace me fully.

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