Toxic

Coming Clean

Losing my head, spinning 'round and 'round...

Liv glanced nervously from the stove up at Oliver, who was looking out the windows that led to the back garden. She then went back to cooking, taking a large drink of her wine to help calm her nerves. She had legitimately forgotten he was planning to come over for dinner night, she was so caught up in work with Draco. She knew she should have brought him over before now, but with everything between them, she wasn't sure she could handle bringing him into her house.

But at the same time, from the moment they started working, she knew that bringing him in was the right move and would ultimately help her research - which was much bigger than just her and even her family. Yes, she was doing this for Grams, but if she could save others from going through the torture of gradually losing everything in your mind that made you you, then it was worth it.

But that wasn't the important thing in this moment. From the stern clenching of Oliver's jaw, she knew that they were about to have a conversation she wasn't ready to have, though she knew she should have had with him weeks ago.

She knew that she should have been completely honest with him when he asked her about that night with Flint. Why Draco was there. What had happened afterwards. She wasn't even sure why she didn't tell him. Maybe because she wasn't completely sure what her feelings were on that. Was she still attracted to Draco? Yes. But there was no future there, she knew this. As long as she was his boss, there couldn't be. The rules were very clear on that aspect. Not to mention, even without that, she wanted them to work together.

And sleeping with your work partner sounded like a sure way to complicate things. At least doing it regularly. She hadn't known that night, which was her one saving grace.

She moved the pan from the stove, turning it off, focusing on the task and finding some comfort in that.

"So... why was he here?" Oliver finally asked. She looked up, seeing that he was looking at her. He didn't look angry, which she thought was at least a small mercy. But she wasn't sure she liked the lingering hurt that was there instead.

"I told you, we're working on research together," she said, looking back down at the food as she portioned it out onto plates.

"Why didn't you tell me about this before?" he asked. She took a deep breath and looked up at him.

"My work is... I don't often talk about it," she said. "It's... personal." He just stared at her. She conveniently left out that every other time she tried, his eyes glazed over. "You know that my grandparents are no-maj, er, muggle." He nodded. "My grandmother was diagnosed with a degenerative disease two years ago. It's stealing her memory. I'm trying to fix that and Draco is helping me."

Oliver took a deep breath and slowly let it out. She didn't miss the slight wince when she had said his name. God, were people here really that adverse to using first names? Or read into it that much? He was just her co-worker for crying out loud. Okay, well, maybe more than that...

"That wasn't so bad. Why couldn't you tell me that?" he asked. Liv shrugged and looked away, her brow furrowed.

"I don't like to talk about my personal life," she said.

"Liv... we're dating. I think we're at that point. You've already told me other things," he said. She looked over at him. "I mean... you don't have to tell me everything and you can take your time with it. But you don't have to hide things from me."

"I know," she said, swallowing thickly. He then took another deep breath.

"Why Malfoy? There are loads of others in the department. Why does it have to be him?" he asked. "And is there more there that you're not telling me?" Olivia frowned. "Merlin, I've seen the way he looks at you. Just... be honest with me."