Weak Hero Random Fanfic

made with a generator

Wolf to a sad Hwangmo at some point: I’d like to offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals.

Gray : Naturally, we are on the cutting edge of technology.
Eugene, amazed: Wow...
Teddy, to Eugene: Well what does that mean?
Eugene: I don't know.
Eugene, to Person A: What does that mean?

Donald: Wolf, keep an eye on Jimmy today. They're going to say something to the wrong person and get punched.
Wolf: Sure, I’d love to see Jimmy get punched.
Donald: Try again.
Wolf, sighing: I will stop Jimmy from getting punched.

Ben: I told Gray his ears flush when he lie.
Eugene: Why?
Ben: Look.
Ben: Hey Gray! Do you love us?
Gray, covering their ears: No.
Person C:

Ben: HELP! I TOLD PERSON C I’D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN’T COOK!
Alex, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?

Jack: Let me show you a picture from last night that really upset me
Jimmy: Okay, but in my defense, they bet me 50 cents I couldn’t drink all that shampoo.
Jack: That’s not what I wanted to- you drank SHAMPOO?!

Alex, in a high voice, holding barbie: hey ken! I was thinking about going back to school and starting a career!
Ben, in a deep voice, holding ken: nonsense, barbie. you’re staying home and having my kids
Gerard: what the fuck are you guys doing?
Alex: playing systemic oppression

Dean, to Jake: My life is in the hands of an idiot!
Jake, motioning to themself and Eunchan: No no no no no, TWO idiots!

Rowan: I was arrested for being too cool.
Teddy: The charges were dropped due to a lack of supporting evidence

Jack: You know, I'm starting to regret showing you how that blender works.
Jimmy, drinking toast: Why do you say that?

Wolf: Go to Hell
Grape, tearing up: I wish I could.

Forrest: Why are your tongues purple?
Jack: We had slushies. I had a blue one.
Jimmy: I had a red one.
Forrest: oh
Forrest:
Forrest: OH
Jake:
Jake: You drank each other's slushies?

Alex, Ben, and Gerard are sitting on a bench
Rowan: Why do you guys look so sad?
Ben: Sit down with us so we can tell you.
*Rowan sits down*
Alex: The bench is freshly painted.

Grape: Dandelions symbolize everything I want to be in life
Forrest: Fluffy and dead with a gust of wind?
Grape: Unapologetic. Hard to kill. Feral, filled with sunlight, bright, beautiful in a way that the conventional and controlling hate but cannot ever fully destroy. Stubborn. Happy. Bastardous. Friends with bees. Highly disapproving of lawns. Full of wishes that will be carried far after I die.
Eunchan: edible

Person A: Are you the big spoon or the little spoon?
Jack: I'm a knife.
Jimmy, from across the room: They're the little spoon.

Jake: Who thinks I can fit 15 marshmallows in my mouth?
Dean: You’re a hazard to society
Eunchan:  And a coward. DO TWENTY.

Wolf: If there's going to be a big dramatic scene, wait until I get back.
Jake: Of course. I can't flip this table by myself.

Alex: Ben was banned from the chicken shack, so we had to go out of town to get some.
Ben: Well, they shouldn’t say “all you can eat” if they don’t mean it.
Alex: Ben, you ate a chair.